


Kiss The Ring

by Crashcoursemaster



Category: Original Work
Genre: Drug Use, Falling In Love, Friends to Lovers, Gang Violence, I'll add more tags as the story progresses, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Mafia Environment, Mutual Pining, Original Male Character/Original Non-Binary Character - Freeform, Other, Rating May Change, Slow Burn, addiction/recovery, future smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-03
Updated: 2019-08-18
Packaged: 2020-07-30 12:30:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 33,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20097268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crashcoursemaster/pseuds/Crashcoursemaster
Summary: Dudael is an interesting place, this bustling city considered by almost all to be the seedy underbelly of the entire Underworld, and completely overrun with organized crime. The current Boss tries to set his intended successor on the straight and narrow, but ends up finding help in the most unusual place, in one of his hit men.





	1. The Prince of Dudael

Dudael ia an interesting place, this bustling city considered by almost all to be the seedy underbelly of the entire Underworld. Though demons of all stripes were born and often lived their whole lives here, many seek a new life in the higher circles. They longed to commune with the more prestigious Fallen, the ones who frequent the mortal coil and often play a part in the judgment of those who have passed on. Of course, demons of this status looked down on those who managed to crawl their way out of the so-called slum. They cast their keen eyes down on those demons, claiming them to be unclean or no better than the mortals that had crossed their paths. Even the noble demon who ruled over the circle ignored the struggling city. While nobles in other circles placed their leaders into government positions to help everything run smoothly, the slothful noble keeps his reach of influence small, and Dudael was at the bottom of his priority list. With the massive power vacuum his absence created, the city descended into absolute chaos. The ancients that managed city affairs were powerless to do anything as gangs sprouted up like wildfire, bringing with them a hunger for violence, struggling to cement someone as the true ruler. The mayor was terrified for his life, cowering away and letting his city be overrun by the upstarts. Once the dust had settled, one demon rose to the top and claimed Dudael for his own, forcing the mayor to relinquish power to him and his ruthless pack. Dernazas, The Don. What the four-horned devil lacked in muscle and strength he more than made up for in intelligence. Manipulation was is weapon of choice, blessed with a silver tongue, he lulled his enemies in close before dispatching his men to take care of any dirty work. Strikes often came without warning, stamping out any rebellion before enough demons could rally. He took well enough care of those under his employ that rats became less and less common the further his roots went. Generation after generation, the offspring of his followers replaced the ones that fell, old age rarely being a cause of death in most cases. Demons, while living lives well into the thousands of years, usually snuffed each other out before their 800th birthday. While Dernazas kept himself well-protected, he knew he either had to select someone to succeed him, or risk being overthrown himself. Unfortunately in his determination to ensure all of his employees were fresh and well-trained, he neglected to name a successor early, and left him with two reliable options. There was Tazgon, a relatively older demon in his ranks and the current leader of Dernazas' small group of assassins. The built devil certainly had the strength to lead, but often relied on brute-force and fear to lead, rather than strategy. Still, someone who had been serving under Dernazas for well over 300 years was a solid choice. The other option, Dernazas' only child, Nollahar. He would love to simply call the young fireball his heir outright, but of course, children never turn out exactly how their parents would like. The child was completely obsessed with self-image, spending their nights party hoping, high as a kite and severely cross-faded. The Don had tried to be supportive, first with small things, like no longer referring to Nollahar as his “son” while maintaining the same reference pronouns. Then, with bigger things, like paying for surgeries to help him feel more comfortable in his body, all things Dernazas was happy to do, but the downward spiral caught him off guard. The Don's wife had passed away suddenly two years ago, and Nollahar had to try and juggle both his new identity and the loss of his mother. He turned to self-medicating in an attempt to cope, and Dernazas was powerless to stop the out of control demon. He even placed his child on the city council in a desperate attempt to get him clean, but only drove Nollahar deeper down the rabbit hole. The Don thus took a more active role in his child's life again, meeting with the young demon as often as he could, assisting in his council duties, making sure he was eating and sleeping as needed, being the father he knew Nollahar needed.  


Today was one such meeting. Dernazas sat behind his wide mahogany desk, the top of it littered with papers and file folders. His calloused fingers lifted a few selected sheets to his aging face, eyes squinting through small circular reading glasses. Pale jade sclera rested behind the straining yellow pupils, his right one almost white from blindness. A couple of deep scars marred his copper skin, one running across his eye, contributing to the loss of vision, the other on the opposite cheek, just above his jawline. One clawed hand reached up to the top of his bald head, wiping away a few beads of sweat from between his long horns with a handkerchief. An annoyed clicking sound against the wood desk made his pointed ears twitch, irritating the old man as he mulled over his papers. His eyes shot up to the source of the noise, his child seated across from him on the other side of the desk, one elbow propping up their head by their cheek, the other hand tapping its manicured fingertips on the surface, the claw tips generating the clicking. Dernazas took the quiet moment to study the figure before him, copper skin like his own, though much more youthful. Sandy blonde hair waved to one side, a small fluff on top that partially covered the right side of their head, the rest shaved down almost bare. Curled tan horns wrapped around the sides of their head, just barely crossing in front of their heavily jeweled ears. Their face held a vacant stare, the same jade and yellow eyes as his own looking off into space, the young demon seemingly lost in thought as they continued to drum their fingers on the desk. Dernazas sighed, returning his eyes to the papers in front of him,  


“Noah,” his voice was gruff and deep, annoyance laced over his words as he addressed his child, “Please stop that incessant tapping.”  
The small hand slapped flat to the desk, boredom causing him to let out a heavy sigh, “Papa, do I really have to be here right now? Couldn’t you just give me what you want to present when you’re done?”  


Dernazas set the papers back down on the desk, removing his glasses from his wide nose, “I asked you to meet with me first because I needed to discuss with you,” he opened a small drawer in his desk and retrieved a magazine, slapping the booklet to the desk, “this.”  


Noah’s face paled, leaning over the desk to look at the cover and into his own eyes plastered on the front. A deep blush crossed his features, sinking back into the chair, averting his eyes from his father, “So I had a little fun last night, I’m not allowed to cut loose every once in a while?”  


The stout demon returned his glasses to his face, flipping the magazine open and reading a passage aloud, “Noah was arrested last night at The Azure Skull’s hangout, found to be in possession of various drug paraphernalia and with a blood alcohol percentage of well over five percent*.” His eyes darted back to the small demon, watching them curl in on themselves further, “Upon further inspection, the heir to Dernazas was also seen earlier that night,” the stout demon paused, the next few words catching in his throat, “was also seen earlier that night, publicly engaged in acts of a sexual nature, prompting police to further investigate his actions, leading to his arrest.”  


A loud slap resonated through the study, glossy pages hitting each other as the booklet was flipped closed and tossed back on the desk. Dernazas leaned on his elbows, grabbing a lit cigar from the nearby ash try and bringing it to his mouth, taking a drag off of it. He awaited a response from his child, the small demon shrinking into the cushioned chair.  


“Okay…so…things may have gotten a little out of hand last night…” Noah finally whispered, his face hot, “But they let me go! And I still would’ve been on time for my meeting!”  


“This has nothing to do with the damn meeting Nollahar!” Dernazas stood abruptly, slamming his hands on the desk, “My men have more important things to do than bail you out of prison. On top of that, think about what this does to your image, to my image! The demons in this town barely take you seriously as it is, and them hearing about you whoring yourself out certainly isn’t helping!” He saw tears form in Noah’s eyes, and he sighed, ashing his cigar before rounding his desk and kneeling down beside the heavily shamed demon, lifting his chin up to lock eyes, “The folks around here are dangerous Noah, there’s a large amount of demons who would do a lot better with you dead.” Dernazas’ voice softened, trembling at the horrific thought of losing his beloved child, “I just wish you’d be more careful. You have the whole city watching you at all times, I would hate to see you get stuck somewhere I can’t get you out of.” He wiped a tear from Noah’s eye with his thumb, “Do you understand?”  


Noah nodded, offering his father a light smile, “I do Papa…I’m sorry…”  


“Just promise me to tone it back a little, maybe stop fraternizing with our enemies to start?” Dernazas chuckled, trying to lighten the mood back up. Scolding his child was never his strong suit. He could scream and yell and call his own employees useless until he was blue in the face, but when it came to Noah, the old man was gentler. Maybe it was the resemblance the young demon held in his features that reminded Dernazas of his late wife, the only other demon to ever bring him joy, that kept his anger mild. Even saying his heir’s true name irked him, only using it when he lost his temper. Sure it was traditional, and the new trend of younger demons abandoning their true names for more modern, mortal sounding ones was strange, but Dernazas grew accustomed to it. “And maybe lay off the hard stuff? Can you do that for your old man?”  


“Of course Papa,” Noah leaned into his father’s touch, placing his own hand over the larger one on his cheek, “But for the record, I wasn’t taking _all_ of it.”  


The Don shook his head, lightly patting Noah’s cheek, letting out an exasperated sigh, “I wish you weren't taking _any_ of it.” He rose back up to his feet, straightening out his blazer and returning to his seat, “But I trust you know your own limits. At least, I would hope you do.”  


“Of course I do Papa,” Noah slung one of his lithe legs over the other, straightening himself out in his seat. He bounced the now elevated cloven foot idly, resuming his tapping on the arm of the chair, “I just lost a little control last night, that's all. Although, I don't think the council will be as understanding of that.”  


“I don't think so either, those old crows have always been stuck in their ways.” Dernazas placed his cigar back in his mouth, rifling back through the papers on his desk, “I highly doubt they'll do much, but I do know the chairman has a violent temper. He may try and scold you as if you were his own.”  


“You say that like I can’t handle myself.” Noah pouted, “I’m not a baby anymore Papa. I know how to handle myself in a fight.”  


“I know that pumpkin.” Dernazas started gathering up his selected papers into the empty file folder on his desk, “That being said, I think it would be wise to send you along with some muscle today.”  


“Muscle?” The small demon lifted his head from his hand and uncrossed his legs, “Papa, you can’t seriously be suggesting what I think you are?” He stood, placing his hands the desk, his face scrunching up in disgust, “Not to mention the fact I don’t need a fucking _babysitter_, all of your goons are complete jerks!”  


“Noah,” Dernazas’ words were stern, “Don’t use that language with me. I'm doing this for your own good.” He handed his child the finished file, “Your escort should be waiting for you out front, and that's the end of it. Now run along, you’re going to be late. Best not to keep the council waiting.”

Noah snatched the file from his father’s hand with a huff. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. The young demon may be small, but he could protect himself if he had to, he did plenty of that last night and still got back in one piece. Turning on his hooves, he stormed out of the study, his father calling out after him,  


“I love you Noah! Be sure to call when the meeting ends!”  


He slammed the study door shut behind him, tightening his grip on the folder, his hooves clicking as he crossed the wooden floor, tail flicking behind him with every aggravated step causing the blonde fringe to tickle at his exposed calves. He let out another huff, flipping the file open to review the materials his father handed him, channeling his annoyance into focus. Scanning over the various papers, he lost himself in his work. Whether he liked it or not, Noah was actually quite well versed in politics, and he did a pretty decent job at being the liaison for the organization. While most of it was horrendously boring, the few intellectual arguments he could stir up among the other old demons on the council provided the young demon with some entertainment during daylight hours. Though it was only as entertaining as listening to clones of his father ranting about how disillusioned the current generation of young demons were further worsening the cities reputation, inciting more gang violence and turf wars than Dudael had seen in the last 100 years. Current gang hierarchies being overthrown almost every day, the police struggling to respond to and properly handle all the new cases being picked up, Noah hears about it all. The council respects the young demon in a sense. To them, seeing a member of the same problematic generation so heavily involved in many aspects of gang activity still serve an older boss was admirable, even if the boss was his father. Noah knew he wasn’t cut out for leadership, at least not at his age, still much more interested in living in the moment and enjoying his youth while he had it. He had access to a nearly endless supply of money, so the only work he absolutely had to do was endure a few meetings two or three times a week, attend parties and, at least try, to keep up appearances of simply being the shining example of gang youth. When that was over, he was no different than the other members of his generation, which up until today had remained pretty well under wraps. His father would have his head if he found out the true extend of Noah's indulgence. The drinking, the drug use, the promiscuity, all par for the course for the young demon. The same generation that was in a perpetual cycle of seizing and losing then regaining power in the other lesser mobs, were the same ones Noah partied with. He flaunted his status to gain access to it all, teasing young new bosses with promises of ruling the whole city by overthrowing “mean ol’ daddy” if they slept with him. Lies of course. His father was untouchable in the eyes of the public, so hearing that all an ambitious young boss has to do is get in good with The Don’s sultry heir was usually all that was needed for pants to come off and for Noah to receive his prize. Then, when the fun was over and the highs subsided, disappear into the night, leaving only a hazy memory of promised power swept out from under their feet. The whole routine was just that by now, a routine. It has become so mundane that Noah was becoming sloppy, having a little more alcohol than normal, _just one more line_, thoughts of “I can take my time with this one, night’s still young” clouding his judgement. Being arrested was something new, having never been caught with his pants down like that. Now the whole city could see how sloppy he was, how so alike he was to other demons in his generation, and Noah wondered how he was going to face the council. His face grew hot again, the shame and embarrassment turning his copper skin a light shade of pink. He paused in the grand foyer of his father’s estate in front of a small wooden cabinet, the surface littered with junk mail, keys of various shapes and uses, and a few pens. Plucking a ball point pen from the bunch, he leaned over the surface, scrawling a reminder in his notes,  


“Play off the tabloid issue: ONE TIME THING”  


That last part underlined a thousand times for emphasis. Satisfied with his note, he swiped his house key from its hook on the cabinet and strode out the front door to the awaiting chauffeur.

Raucous laughter boomed through the room, loud voices shouting over one another as their owners tried to control the chaotic conversation. Five demons sat around a very worn table, discarded beer cans and ashtrays covered the surface leaving barely enough room for everyone’s resting arms. Fists slammed the top every now and again, shaking the wobbly furniture, sending an occasional can flying off the edge. The men seemed to be lost in conversation, or what to them was a conversation. Most of their meetings just devolved into shouting matches as they fought and shouted at each other, these loud disturbances being the main reason why their dorm area was so far away from the rest of the estate. After one too many trips down to their old location in the east wing, Dernazas moved the whole crew into the basement, far enough beneath the rest of the estate that the shouting was barely audible, perfect for what amounted to five rowdy frat boys.  


“Alright, shut up, the lot of you.” A thunderous voice cut through the shouting, the cacophony settling down to a low murmur as individual conversations carried on, “I’ve got your assignments for the day.” The demon that sat at the head of the table stood, pulling a small stack of files off his lap and dropping them on the table, “I don't wanna hear any bitchin' or whinin' either.” he spread the files out in front of him, shoving away some of the debris to make room. Each simple manila folder had a name on it, some of them bearing multiple names, signaling to the rest of the group which one to grab. Various shapes of paws and hands headed for the center of the table, pulling the assignments to their respective owners.  


“Oh come on Taz,” a shrill voice whined from the head demon's left side, “Why do I always get stuck with _cleaning?_”  


“'Ey,” the head of the table, Tazgon, pointed a clawed finger at his cohort, “What did I say about whinin' Buzz?”  


Various snickers filled the room, the other demons going over their files. The shrill voiced imp settled back into his seat, grumbling curses under his breath.  


“And be sure to use soap this time, tiny.” a gravely voice chimed in with the ribbing of the imp, its' hulking owner chuckling as he looked up at from his papers, “Last time you cleaned up we all came back to everything smelling like wet dog.”  


“Well who's fault is that,” Buzz flapped his wings, lifting his small stature up into the air, “_Fuzzbutt?_”  


The giant growled, leaning forward in his seat, face snarling from the comment. Taz slammed the table again, silencing the bickering demons, “Both of you, cram it! Will,” he shot the beast to his right a sharp glare, “Stay focused on your own tasks for a change.” He heard Buzz snicker beside him, “And you,” he turned his attention back to the small creature, “If I have to pick up your slack again, I'm mounting that smart ass of yours to the wall, capische?”  


Buzz landed back in his seat, hot shame crossing his face. Taz scanned the rest of the table, keeping an eye out for any more outbursts. The remaining two demons silently reviewed their work. He caught one of them, the only other humanoid of the group, twisting his face into a confused grimace, yet remained silent, keeping any complaints to himself.  


“Something you wanna add Zak?” Taz called him out, “Might as well since these two idiots broke the 'no complaining' rule already.”

The other demon perked up, a prickle running down his spine at the call. He calmed his expression, recognizing it was the reason behind his leader singling him out. He placed the file down open in front of him, leaning back in his seat. A clawed hand scratched the back of his bald head before speaking,  


“Actually yeah, there is.” Zak pursed his lips, picking his phrasing, “Why exactly did this come through us? Seems more like something too...mundane, for our position?”  


He glanced back down at his assignment, rereading it very carefully. It was to escort his Boss' kid to some meeting, definitely not something that seemed in line with the hitman's usual tasks. Unless this meeting was deep in the bowels of the city, where anyone could potentially kill the poor bastard and Zak could actually enjoy a fight, he wasn't interested. Still, it was work, and being a man of, somewhat, honest intent, he would do the job with little complaint.  


“The Don actually specifically requested that go to you bud,” Taz took a drag from the cigarette between his fingers, a wicked smile crossed his face, “Can't imagine why.”  


The other demons snickered at the sly comment. Zak's face grew hot, growling back at his comrades, “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”  


“Maybe the boss wants ya to finally pull that stick out of your ass and loosen up.” Will jabbed at him, slapping a massive paw to Zak's back.  


“Yeah!” Buzz fluttered up again, leaning against the table, “Partying with the fuckin' Prince of Dudael is a privilege! That guy goes hard!”  


“It's a meeting you fuckwad.” the voice came from the last member of the group, who up until now had remained silent, yanking the imp next to him back to the chair, “Besides,” he bore a toothy grin, “Zak's too much of a pussy to actually chase that rabbit.”  


Zak thrust his arm across the table, grabbing the snarky lizard by the collar, “What did you just say to me?” he snarled, readying his free hand into a tight fist.  


“Hey, chill out man,” the scaly demon held his hands up in a show of surrender, “The brat's probably too worn out to try and tempt ya' anyways.”  


“What the hell are you talkin' about Talon?” Zak questioned, still ready to pop his cohort in the teeth.  


“Wait, do you really not know?” Taz laughed, drawing Zak's attention away from Talon.  


Zak blinked in confusion, glancing around the room at the other guys around the table, “Know what?”  


“Dude.” Buzz whipped his phone out, tapping away at the screen, hunting for something, “What rock do you hide under?”  


“Yeah man,” Will leaned back in his seat, “It's been all over the place since yesterday.”  


Zak released Talon's shirt, suddenly intrigued. He squinted at the blue light as Buzz shoved the small cell phone in is face.  


“He went fuckin' nuts last night,” the shrill voice explained, releasing his grip on the device as Zak scrolled through the article plastered on the screen, “Ended up in the dog house, too.”  


Zak's face continued to heat up as he sifted through the pictures, finally handing the phone back when his normally chocolate features were bright red, “Aw dude, I don't wanna see all that.”  


“You're out of your mind dude,” the imp snatched his phone from Zak's hand, “These are gold.”  


“Buzz,” Talon snorted, “You're fucking disgusting.”  


Zak rested his face in his hand, the continuing conversation fading into the background as his mind blinked back to the pictures he saw of his employer's kid. The skinny creature on his knees, scantily clad, cheeks red from inebriation and lust. The dark-skinned demon was beginning to understand the nature of his assignment. The Don needs a babysitter. Zak tapped his foot on the ground, frustration bubbling in his stomach. He started to wonder what he did wrong for his boss to give him such a boring task. Out of the five of them, Zak was the most loyal to Dernazas, always finishing his hits quickly and effectively, making as little mess as possible. Could that be the reason? Was this some sick ploy to get the bulky demon to loosen up, like Will suggested? Zak very rarely let himself have fun, much more content in watching parties from the comfort of the wall, or better yet, not being there at all. Even when he and his group of killers went out together, the others had to drag him out of the estate, a flurry of curses and protests following him out. Thus he became the sober one, the one to remain vigilant over the group, keeping the others out of trouble...a babysitter. 'God damn it.' he cursed under his breath, embarrassment adding to the already prominent flush on his cheeks. The boss must've heard from Tazgon how lame he was and that's why he got saddled with the brat. His eyes drifted back down to the file in front of him, studying the picture attached of Dernazas and his heir before the image of the same smiling demon with a cock in his mouth flashed in front. Zak shook his head, flipping the folder shut, trying to shove the lewd photographs from his mind. He turned to look at Taz, the grizzled leader appearing to be wrapping up the “meeting” and trying to reign in the others. Sharp eyes landed on his own, and Zak stiffened, realizing that he hadn't been listening and was now expected to answer a question he didn't hear.  


“Zakamin!” Taz finally barked, regaining Zak's attention, “You can daydream about the brat later, move your ass.”  


Obediently, Zak rose from his seat, leaving his assignment folder on the table but snagging his pack of cigarettes and tucking them into the rear pocket of his pants. With a flick of his spade tipped tail, he stomped off towards the stairs, face still cherry red. A shaky hand wiped his forehead, clearing away some of the sweat that had accumulated between his horns. He muttered more obscenities in a harsh whisper as he crossed through the basement door and out into the empty foyer of the estate, heading straight for the front drive. He cursed both himself and his boss for what was sure to be the most boring afternoon of Zak's life. The words exchanged by his comrades kept creeping back through his mind too, their jabs at his expense only causing his anger to strengthen. 'Maybe they're right,' he pondered silently, 'Maybe this is supposed to loosen me up.' He let out a huff, letting his emotions subside, pressing his hand to the front door, pausing to allow himself to fully cool off. 'Just do your assignment Zak. Don't bring up what you saw, and keep your head down. This'll all be over soon.' He pushed the door open and stepped across the threshold, crossing the porch to the running vehicle idling in the driveway. Giving the chauffeur a quick nod, he popped the door open and climbed inside, settling into one of the bench seats closest to the driver. He pulled his phone from his pocket and began fiddling with it as he awaited the arrival of his task.

The car door was already propped open when Noah stepped outside, the warm summer heat ticking his skin as the sun beat down on him. He carried an uncharacteristic scowl on his face, preparing to face whatever one of his father's pigs would be waiting for him inside the car. The hand not holding his notes tugged at the hem of his pencil skirt, trying to straighten himself out and conceal his figure to avoid any unwanted stares from the still unknown bodyguard. Noah's past experience with the few assassins in his father's employment left a rotten taste on his tongue. They drooled over him, undressing the lithe demon with hungry eyes, assuming they could flex status on him to get his legs apart. The young creature shuddered, thinking back to the amount of skull he had to bash the last time he was given an escort. He had two if he recalled properly. An imp, no bigger than Noah and a mouth full of sass, and a drake creature, definitely bigger than his partner, but just as vile. The pair of demons spent more time ogling than their actual task, nearly getting the heir killed in the process. After a very stern chewing out from Noah while still on the job, the drake backed off, but his buddy decided to assert himself, grabbing a dual handful of Noah’s butt while in public. That was a fun debriefing with his father, having to explain the prominent hoof-shaped bruises covering the imp’s body. Since then, Dernazas hasn’t paired his child with one of the hit men as a guard. Instead, he basically quarantined the young demon to his meetings and the estate, giving the out of town tasks to his other employees. Noah prayed to the deities below that whoever he was saddled with this time knew how to respect boundaries. Taking in a deep breath, he slid into the rear seat of the car, keeping his eyes closed as he addressed the other demon he chose not to look at,  


“Alright, let's get this over with and out of the way. I-” the words died on his tongue, his eyes opened and landed on the dark skinned bulk that rested on the seat across from him. Noah had never seen this one before, “Oh, you're new.” his whole body relaxed, a wave of relief washing over him.  


“Maybe to you, but yes.” he spoke low and quickly, barely glancing up from the phone in his hands. Seemed like he was purposefully avoiding eye contact, Noah hoped out of shyness more than out of embarrassment, or even worse, to avoid temptation.  


“At least you aren't that disgusting little, thing, I got stuck with last time.” Noah leaned his back to the corner of the seat, pulling the car door shut and tossing his file of notes onto the dark leather beneath him. His comment earned him an amused snort from his escort, eyes still glued to the phone. Noah rolled his eyes. He was trying to make conversation with the other demon, at least attempting to be cordial, but was being ignored, and if there was one thing he hated, it was being ignored. He crossed his legs at the ankle, hooking one of his feet behind the other, pressing his thighs together, “Must be looking at something mighty important for you to be this rude.”  


The large demon finally lifted his eyes from the screen, pale yellow sclera with bright red pupils narrowed in annoyance. Two tan S-bend horns stuck out from the bare scalp, pointed ears sitting below them, the lobes stretched out to accommodate the solid black gauges, a mark in the organization to signal to others who he was and what his role was. A black button-up top covered his broad chest and shoulders, sleeves rolled up over his elbows, leaving his forearms bare. A light pink dusted the stoic expression glued to the brown skin on his face, remnants of what appeared to be, blush? Noah cocked his head to the side, he didn't embarrass the poor thing, did he? He kept his eyes on the other, watching as the phone was set aside and he rested on his knees, “Sorry, I was told you don't care much for being accompanied to your meetings, I assumed you'd want me to be quiet.” The deep voice sent shivers through the heir's spine. Noah found it difficult to speak, the glare hitting his face choking him.  


“I, um, I wasn't trying to, I mean, I,” The small demon stammered, his brain rushing words out of his mouth faster than he could form actual sentences, “Thank you,” he finally regained control of his tongue, “I appreciate your consideration...” he hung on the last syllable, waiting for his associate to finish the gratitude with his name.  


“Zak.” the larger said curtly, his expression unchanging.  


“Zak,” the simple address rolled off of Noah's tongue with a click, “Well Zak,” he retrieved his folder again, opening it, pretending to look busy, “Traffic is usually pretty bad this time of day, so getting downtown will take some time. I don't really care one way or the other if you wanna talk, but I do expect you to at least look me in the eye if I talk to you.”  


“So, I have to maintain eye contact, but you don't?” Noah shot Zak a glare from behind his notes, the other hosting a satisfied smirk, “Hardly seems fair.”  


Noah chuckled, amused by the snark coming from Zak's mouth. “Well, now you know how I felt earlier smart ass.”  


“You talk to all of your daddy's workers this way princess?” Zak sneered, plucking his pack of cigarettes and a small lighter from his pocket before removing one stick, placing it between his teeth and lighting it.  


Noah tore the folder from his face, pursing his lips at the comment, “First of all, don't call me princess.” he pointed a finger at Zak, “Second, I can tell that neither of us are happy with this arrangement, the least you can do is spare the snarky attitude.”  


Zak reclined in his seat, holding up his hands in defeat, “Okay, okay.” He softened his features, giving Noah a much more apologetic look, “I was only teasing, didn’t mean to offend you.”  
Silence hung between them, only the gentle sizzle of Zak’s lit smoke and the gentle hum of the car engine filling their ears. Noah started at the carpet that lined the car’s floor under their feet, trying not to look back into Zak’s intense gaze. He was still on edge from the discussion with his father before he left, and taking out his aggressions on a stranger never got him anywhere. Plus, this demon seemed, sweet, in a way, much more considerate than his cohorts, aside from the sass. Something about how Zak carried himself the small demon found admirable, attractive, even. Confidence dripped from every aspect of the larger demon, from his cocky smirk to the steady rise and fall of his broad chest, to his stoic expression that, despite all the sneering and low laughter he had been emitting during their spat, never seemed to falter, maintaining total control over his features. Noah’s heart fluttered. Power alone was enough to get him going in terms of flirtation, but Zak had none, at least none he could hold over Noah, the heir outranked him on a technicality after all. No, something else was at play here, something Noah couldn’t quite place a finger on, but as his eyes studied every prominent muscle that lay beneath Zak’s battle-hardened skin, he was prepared to explore his options with this handsome stranger. He let a sly smile cross his cheeks, nodding towards Zak,  


“You gonna share with the class tough guy?” Noah leaned forward, the loose fabric of his blouse following his movement, falling off his shoulders slightly.  


Zak’s eyes shifted over again, a soft chuckle rumbling in his throat, “I suppose so,” he pulled another cigarette from the pack, handing it to Noah, lighting it for him once in its place between Noah’s lips, “Didn’t peg you as the smoking type.” He drew a long breath off his own smoke, exhaling slowly, “Figured your old man would’ve kept you far away from the stuff.”  


“Yeah well,” Noah looked out of the car window, fiddling with the tobacco between his index and middle fingers, “Some sins run deep I guess.” He brought the cigarette back to his lips, letting the smoke crackle and fill his lungs fully before releasing, the burn calming his nerves.”Plus it’s rarer to find someone in this town who _doesn’t_ smoke these days.”  


“Yeah, that’s a good point.” Zak quickly averted his eyes from the heir, blush returning to his face. He’s hiding something.  


“You can look at me you know,” Noah teased, “Unless you find the upholstery more interesting.”  


“Very funny. Just,” he let out a quick huff before sucking on his cigarette again, “Not very good at eye contact.”  


“Bullshit.” Noah leaned forward again, “I know how Papa picks you guys, and I also know that he purposely looks for cocky guys like you.” Noah clicked his tongue, a blush of his own forming on his cheeks. Judging by how invested Zak was in his device earlier, the realization slowly hit Noah that maybe, _that_, had something to do with all of this aversion. He hunched his shoulders, shrinking back, “Is it the...you know…” his voice trailed off.  


“Wasn’t gonna bring it up.” Zak finally admitted. So, he was right. Zak was just trying to spare Noah any further embarrassment. A fresh wash of shame flushed the young demon’s face, turning back to the window.  


“I’m not always like…that…you know?” Noah sighed, trying to set the record straight, “I don’t shack up with anything with a pulse like those articles lead people to believe, so don’t get any ideas.”  


“Actually, I had no idea you were in any manner of hot shit until right before we left.” Noah perked up slightly, “I heard about the smack down you gave Buzz and Talon last time one of us worked with you, I’m not the same kind of womanizing scum-bag those two assholes are, so you’re not gonna have to defend yourself again. I actually care about keeping my job.” The names Zak spoke of didn’t recall any faces in Noah’s mind, but he could only imagine they’re two of his comrades, “You wanna live your life that way, more power to ya, I’m just here to do my job, collect my pay and keep my nose clean.”Noah’s cheeks warmed up as Zak spoke, thanking his father internally for sending someone so…sincere. “Though if I may,” Zak paused, looking up at Noah’s face, offering the shamed demon a gentle smile, “I don’t think sloppy suits you. You look stunning just like this.”  


Noah could’ve died right then and there and he would’ve been just as happy. He was already blushing before, but now he was sure his youthful face was the most brilliant shade of red. His hand shot to his face, using his cigarette as a proxy, covering a huge grin behind his delicate fingers. Never in his life had he heard such a genuine compliment come from someone other than his father. For that matter, Noah wasn’t sure when the last time anyone made such a soft comment about his appearance. Cat-calling, wolf-whistles, being called every synonym for “hot,” those he was used to, but being called _stunning_? And in his _**business clothes**_? His heart began to race. He touched his cheek, the warmth of his cigarette dwarfed by the warmth emanating from his flushed face.  


“T-thank you, Zak.” The warmth spread through Noah’s body, pooling in between his legs for a moment before the sensation fled.  


Zak merely smiled in response, actually looking into Noah’s eyes for the first time this whole car ride. The smaller demon felt his heart stop. Something clicked inside him, a switch he’d long since hidden away deep in the recesses of his mind. Zak was…_flirting_? He couldn’t really tell, the bastard still held the same blank stare as before, just with a smile drawn on where his mouth was supposed to be. He secretly hoped he was anyway, Noah was ready to flirt right back, maybe get something good out of his so-called punishment.  


The car pulled to a stop outside city hall. Noah moved to open the door, but Zak beat him to it, leaning over the small demon to reach. He held his breath, his nose right beside the built demon’s chest, just under the extended arm. He smelled crisp, and clean, only the slightest hint of smoke on him despite nursing a cigarette the whole ride. The warmth returned to his legs, and he pressed his thighs together harder to calm himself. Noah froze, waiting for Zak to move, but the large demon hung there in the open passage way, hunched over.  


“After you.” There was that curt voice again. Noah stammered out a hushed thank you, sliding off the seat, swinging his legs onto the sidewalk and rising up out of the car, his tail following behind. Firmly grasping the folder in his hand, he stepped away from the vehicle to allow Zak space to get out. Noah’s jaw hung open, watching the demon stand up straight to his full height. He had to be at least a foot taller, Noah wasn’t sure, but once he strode up beside him, the top of his head just barely reaching Zak’s chest, it was clear. Noah was already a rather tall figure, standing just around 5’7”, maybe 120 pounds soaking wet, so if he had to hazard a guess, Zak was well over six foot. Noah swallowed, the attraction growing quickly as he stared at his escort. A huge arm was suddenly around his shoulders, ushering the young demon inside quickly. Noah glanced around, spotting the onslaught of cameras that he swore didn’t exist when they stepped out of the car. He lifted the file folder to his face, trying to hide from the prying eyes of the public, his embarrassment returning in full force. Noah was always so conscientious of the cameras that followed him during the day, he cursed at himself for not checking for them before moving into public view. He shrank under Zak’s grip, the large demon using his size to block Noah from view. Wrapped up in such a sturdy grip was extremely comforting, the closeness and warmth causing Noah’s mind to wander again, barely noticing passing under the huge glass doors of city hall and straight to the employee elevator.  


“Do I have to push you all the way in Noah?” Zak unraveled himself from Noah’s shoulders, the loss of warmth snapping the heir back to reality. “I can see why your old man needed to have someone go with you, you locked up like a god damn statue.”  


“I…I didn’t even see them.” Noah fumbled at the key card hanging from his neck, scanning it to call down the elevator, “I guess I got distracted.”  


“Not a wise thing to do when you’re on everyone’s radar right now princess.” Zak turned back toward the door, making sure no unruly paparazzi followed them in, “You’re lucky I’m here.”  


“_I_. Don’t _need_ you here.” Noah hissed, poking Zak in the back, “And what did I say about calling me princess.”  


“Keep acting like one, and I’ll keep calling it like I see it.” Zak clasped his hands behind his back, taking a wide stance.  


Noah opened his mouth to keep arguing, but closed it, realizing he needed to save his voice for defending his actions in front of the council. He huffed, turning back to the elevator as it dinged, “I don’t need you to follow me all the way up.” He stepped inside, holding the door open to give further instruction, “Just wait down here. I’ll be done in a couple of hours.”  


“You got it princess.” Zak turned his head back to Noah, shooting the heir a satisfied grin.  


The young demon rolled his eyes in response, letting the elevator door separate them. Once alone, Noah reclined against the wall of the elevator, not realizing how much tension he was holding in his muscles. He let out a long shaky breath, dragging his hands down his face before letting them rest in the crook of his neck. The blood pumping under his skin vibrated rhythmically, his pulse pounding under his own touch.  


“Come on Noah, keep it together...” he muttered, righting himself up right, “Don't lose your focus just 'cause some handsome asshole made goo-goo eyes at ya...” his face heated again, “The fuckin' prick...”

Zak's ears twitched as he heard the doors close behind him. He could still feel the brat's sharp gaze on his back, even through the solid metal doors. The large demon shook his head, such a feisty little thing that was way too easy to tease. Now he understood why Buzz got his ass whooped. Two demons with a superiority complex never mixed well, coupled with the fact the imp probably did something stupid to push the envelope. Zak laughed under his breath, moving away from the elevator and over to a small grouping of chairs, a waiting area that appeared to be rarely used. It was out of sight enough that he could avoid the stares from other workers at the front desk, but close enough he could be ready to meet back up with Noah when he came back down. He sat down in one of the stiff seats, moving his hand to his back out of instinct, reaching to move a holster that wasn't there. Zak huffed, remembering that part of his assignment was going unarmed. He felt naked without some kind of weapon strapped to him, but then again, he hoped he wouldn't need it for today. If he really needed to put someone in their place, he had his claws and enough muscle behind them to make sure they go in deep. Judging from the nervous eyes that he caught as they came inside though, Zak could enjoy two hours of silence. He pulled his phone back out of his pocket, along with a small pair of earbuds, and reclined into the seat, his thick tail hanging off the edge and onto the ground. He fitted the small ear pieces in place before unlocking his phone, a notification catching his eye. It was Will of all people. Zak rolled his eyes, opening the message,  


_How goes the babysitting?_  


_Dude, I can see why you guys all call him brat._ Zak's claws clicked against the glass as he typed out a response, _But he's not horrible. Seems like he could be a nice guy if he tried to be._  


_You ain't gonna make the same mistake tiny did, are ya?_  


Zak clicked away from the messages for a moment, turning some music on to pass the time, chewing his lip in thought. _Nah, I'm not stupid. Plus, he's not my type._  


_Fair enough. Though if the news is anything to go off of you might be his._  


The large demon growled quietly, his face heating up again, _Don't you have a job to do fuzzbutt?_  


_Just sayin', if the option's there you should take it._  


_You do realize we’re talking about our boss’ son right?_ Zak paused for a moment, was Noah a son? Everyone talks about him like he is one but Zak’s never heard anyone say anything about it. He shook his head, didn’t really matter to him one way or the other, _And since when did you ever care about my love life?_  


_Don’t think no one’s noticed you sulking around homie. You’re still hung up on him and we all know it._  


Zak locked his phone back up after reading that, flipping it over and pressing it against his thigh. He leaned over on his elbows, hands covering his face. His heart started to pound, sweat beading on his forehead as he bounced his knee. Thoughts of his previous partner flooded his brain, memories Zak thought he’d long since forgotten, but always find ways to worm their way back into his conciseness. He felt the phone buzz against him repeatedly, probably Will trying to back peddle from mentioning Zak’s ex. But it was too late, the flood gates had opened and Zak was already spiraling. He turned his music up louder, trying to force the thoughts out of his head. He flipped his phone back over, reading the new messages,  


_That came out wrong. We’re just worried about you man._  


_Zak?_  


_Hey, if you’re freakin’ out again, remember to breathe._  


_Yeah…I’m okay_ Zak finally settled down enough to reply, _Just…hard to talk about still._  


_I know. I’m sorry. We can get a drink when you come back if you want?_  


He shook his head, _Maybe. We’ll see how long I’m expected to stay with Noah._  


_Sounds good._  


He let out a sigh, still bouncing his leg to shake off the anxiety. Glancing around the room, he leaned back in his seat again, making sure no one saw him during his mini meltdown. He checked the time. There was still an hour and a half before the meeting was supposed to end. Zak groaned, resting his head against the cool wall. He closed his eyes, Will’s message replaying in his mind, ‘If the option’s there you should take it, you might be his type.’  


“Since when does Will know anything anyway.” Zak grumbled to himself, “The brat would never go for someone like me.”  


He let out another heavy sigh, thinking back to the banter the two exchanged on the ride. The way Noah’s nose wrinkled whenever he got annoyed, the warm sincerity in the way he smiled when Zak complimented him. Conventionally, he was cute, like a little kid in a lot of ways. Not something the grizzled hit man found admirable, but he could see how Noah won people over so easily. Plus, the little brat was the most fun Zak had on the job in a while. So quick to jump on the offensive, but wasn’t afraid to fire back a back-handed compliment either. Part of him hoped that after the meeting was over wouldn’t be the last time he saw the small demon. He was such an enigma, keeping such a happy façade despite the short temper, Zak wondered how far he could push before Noah relented.  


“God…I’m no better than Buzz.” He laughed internally at himself at the realization. At least for him pushing the envelope meant teasing the poor thing until he found a weak spot. “I don’t know if I wanna see him cry though…seems a little too mean, even for me.” Zak huffed, diving back into his phone, praying the clock would move faster.

He was very surprised that he didn’t fall asleep sitting up in his chair. The last hour and a half felt like days as he sat, occasionally fiddling with his phone, but in general just getting lost in his music, shooting occasional glances at the front desk staff. He pulled the earbuds from his head, standing up and stretching, his knees popping from lack of use. Tucking the electronics back in his pockets, he made his way back to the elevator to wait for Noah. He quickly glanced out through the glass doors to check if anyone would mob them on their way out, seeing no one of interest, but spotting their ride pull up right on time. Zak resumed his stance, hands tucked behind his back, standing off to the side of the sliding metal door. The hum of the moving elevator whirred quietly as it descended, followed shortly by a soft ding. A gentle chorus of conversation could be heard behind the metal door, getting louder as it slid open, revealing Noah chatting with two other older council members. The small demon’s eyes drifted over to Zak, pausing his conversation mid sentence.  


“You didn’t stand there for two hours did you?” He and his companions chuckled.  


“Of course not, just very punctual.” Zak held back a snarky comeback, nodding respectfully to the two older demons.  


“So this is the handsome fellow you were speaking of Nollahar.” The old lady on Noah’s right eyed Zak, “I’d say your description was pretty spot on.”  


Noah laughed off the comment, his face flushing, “Maimei, please, he’s right there.”  


“Come now child.” The other demon, an older male, chimed in, eyeing Zak as well, “You can’t hide that from old folks like us. Besides, settling down would keep you out of the papers.”  


Zak held back a snort. He thought he was gonna give Noah a hard time, these old cronies are beating him to it. Noah began backing away from his coworkers, blush deepening, “Anyway, I’m sure you’re both very busy so if you’ll excuse me,” He turned on his hooves and whispered harshly to Zak, “Let’s get out of here.”  


He practically ran out the door, Zak hot on his heels. The large demon couldn’t hold in the sass anymore, striding alongside Noah, he snickered,  


“Handsome, huh?”  


“Cram a sock in it.” Noah spat back, shoving the glass doors open and making a beeline for the car. Zak popped the door open, letting Noah get in first. He climbed in after, sliding into the same seat he took before. Once settled, he looked back at the heir, who had pulled his own phone from the lanyard around his neck and was hurriedly typing something out on it. Zak drummed his hands against the seats, trying to think of how to react to Noah’s sudden aggression.  


“I take it the meetings didn’t go that well?”  


“It was fine.” Noah barely looked up, “Boring as usual.”  


“You just seem on edge is all.” The larger demon clicked his tongue, “Anything you wanna talk about?”  


“Why do you care all of a sudden?” Noah hissed at him, seeming to try and get Zak to be completely silent.  


“Christ, fine I’ll shut up.” Zak recoiled, pulling out a new smoke for himself, “Don’t have to bite my fucking head off.”  


“Oh don’t do that.” Noah flopped his hands into his lap, looking up at Zak, “Don’t you guilt trip me like that. I don’t need you treating me like the god damn council.” He tucked his head back into his shoulders, returning his screen to his face, “Stupid old assholes…”  


“So…you do wanna talk about your meeting?” Zak glanced back at the heir, pulling a long drag off of his cigarette.  


Noah sighed, leaning over his knees, “It’s just stressful. Imagine like, seven clones of all the worst grandparents you ever knew. Then, multiply that by ten. That’s how old fashioned the council is.”  


“Okay, I agree with you,” Zak chuckled, “That sounds like the absolute worst.” He caught Noah eyeing his smoke again. He shook his head, passing one to Noah without being asked, “So we’re heading back home then?”  


“Only to change for me,” Noah took the smoke happily before he clicked away at his phone again, a devilish smile crawled across his lips, “I’m going out tonight.”  


“You sure that’s a good idea?” Zak warned as he handed Noah his lighter, “I would think after last night you would want to avoid ending up in the pen again.”  


“Lord, you sound like my father.” Noah whined as he lit his cigarette, “Last I checked I’m a fully grown adult capable of making my own decisions.”  


“Never said you weren’t,” Zak pulled one leg up on his knee, reclining in his seat, “Just looking out for you. It’s what I was asked to do.”  


“Again, last I checked,” Noah glanced up from his screen, “You were only asked to get me to my meeting without me getting mobbed, which you did, and now I am no longer in need of you sticking your nose in my business.”  


Zak toyed with the cigarette between his teeth. Noah did have a point, it would be better for both of them if he just let the brat go destroy himself. He was about to make that choice, but something churned in his gut. Talon’s earlier remark suddenly shot back to the front of his mind, ‘Zak’s too much of a pussy to chase that rabbit.’ Is this what he meant? The large demon definitely didn’t want to spend his evening at some party with someone he barely knew, surrounded by people he certainly didn’t know. But something was compelling him. Probably the fact that if his boss found out he willingly let the heir go out and wreck himself again he’d never hear the end of it. Or maybe, deep down, he did actually care about the small demon, and seeing his face plastered all over the internet again knowing Zak could’ve prevented it would eat at him forever.  


“What if I went with you?” He hated that those words just fell out of his mouth.  


Noah looked up at him, blinked a couple of times, then let out a bellowing laugh, laced with mockery, the loudest thing he’d ever heard from such a small thing, “_You?_ Want to go to a _party?_ With _**me?**_ You’ve gotta be joking.”  


“Not as your babysitter, Jack ass.” Zak scanned Noah’s face, “But…as a potential friend?”  


“Okay, now I _know_ you’re joking.” Noah shook his head, taking a long drag off of his cigarette before leaning back into his seat, “What, in the total of an hour we’ve spent together today, gave you the idea that I would ever want to be friends with you?”  


“First of all, ouch.” Zak feigned offense, “Second, you genuinely seem like you could be a nice guy if you let yourself. And,” Zak looked away, “I don’t know, something is telling me I…I should go.”  


“Have you even _been_ to a party like mine?” Noah seemed to be warning Zak now, “It’s way more intense than you might be aware of.”  


“I can hazard a guess. But I’m open to new experiences.” Oh that was the biggest lie Zak’s ever told himself.  


Noah giggled again, turning his attention back to his phone for a few moments, “I mean, if you really wanna go so bad, I’m not gonna stop you.” He looked back into Zak’s eyes, the heir’s yellow pupils seemed to, sparkle slightly, “You seem like, not a _complete_ asshat.” He quickly reverted back to his cocky smirk, “But this doesn’t mean we’re friends.”  


Zak chuckled, “Duly noted princess.”  


“And if you call me princess _one more **fucking** time_.” Noah laughed as the empty threat hit Zak’s ears. “Be ready in the garage by eight, I’ll drive us down there.”  


“You can _drive_? Then why the hell are we being driven around?” Zak laughed incredulously.  


“Um, it’s a little thing called _presentation_, Zak.” Noah shook his head, “Plus Papa insists on it. He doesn’t like me driving around during the day.”  


“Yeah, That certainly does sound like your old man.”  


The two laughed, and Zak felt a genuine smile crawl across his face. Despite all their bickering, he was actually kind of looking forward to spending more time with the brat. Maybe Will knew what he was talking about after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Demon anatomy is largely the same as human, but their bodies are much more resilient. A 5% BAL is equivalent to 1% for a human


	2. Party's Over Princess

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the last of the explicit drug use from here on out, this is rock bottom

Zak was beginning to have second thoughts about this as the two wandered down the alley. He followed closely behind Noah, trying to keep his eyes from traveling too far down the lithe demon’s body, wrapped up in clothes so tight he was surprised the brat could still breathe. He might as well be wearing nothing, only a dark red crop top and black booty shorts covering the important stuff. He had black thigh-high stockings covering his legs, still leaving his heels and hooves exposed. Zak felt a blush crawl across his cheeks, averting his eyes back above the small demon’s head.  
“This is your last chance tough guy.” Noah’s clear voice drifted up to him, “You sure you still wanna go through with this?”  
They stopped in front of a large metal door, Noah’s youthful gaze staring up at Zak. He swallowed, “Yeah. Yeah I’m good.” He tugged at his tank top, not used to showing off this much skin anywhere but home. Noah had told him to ditch the button-up and slacks for this, and all he had that fit the qualifier was one of his workout shirts and a beat-up pair of board shorts.  
Noah knocked against the door, the sound resonating through the abandoned alleyway. After a few moments, a peephole slid open, two sets of eyes peering through it and down at the pair. They narrowed, a soft growl barely audible over the distant pound of bass.  


“He’s with me.” Noah glanced back at Zak, shooting him a reassuring smile.  


There was a loud click before the door slid open slowly. Noah led Zak inside, the tall demon scanning his surroundings nervously. He knew better than to stare at random demons he didn’t know, especially with how big he was, lest he get involved in a brawl he didn’t want. The narrow hallway held a soft pink glow, the red lights above them casting the neon on everything beneath it. Several couples lined the walls, locked in various stages of making out, the soft thump of bass caused the walls to vibrate gently. Another door separated them from the main event, and Noah showed no hesitation in flinging it open, presenting both of them to the most insanely crowded room Zak had ever seen. There had to be at least 1000 demons in here, all of varying shapes and sizes. The club was _gigantic,_ a winding metal staircase in the center of the club led to a loft upstairs, seeming to host more dance floor space. On the other side of the crowd, Zak's eyes caught a dark curtain with three bright red, neon X's hanging over it. He swallowed, having enough street smarts to know exactly what went down over there. The loud music ripped through Zak’s ears and started beating in time with his heart. His eyes had issue finding what to look at first, and before he could settle on one thing, he lost sight of Noah. The small demon nearly vanished into the crowd, and Zak scurried after him, following the fluffy mop that glowed a brilliant yellow under the club lights. The small head turned back around, the mouth moving but Zak couldn’t make out any words over the music. Noah grabbed Zak’s hand, dragging him through the crowd to the bar. He leaned up closer to Zak’s ear,  


“I said, loosen up!” Even shouting directly into Zak’s ear he had issues hearing Noah’s words, “Get a drink! Papa owns this place so just say you work for him!”  


And with that, he was gone, blending into the crowd in the direction of the curtained off area. Zak chuckled, shaking his head. Despite what Noah had told him earlier about the tabloids over-exaggerating his libido, he sure seemed eager to get to work, so to speak. He sat down at a bar stool, situated so he had a somewhat clear view of the club and was a little further away from the speakers. The bar tender, an impossibly tall imp-like creature, approached Zak. He ordered himself an old fashioned to pass the time, reaching for a small wad of cash in his pocket. The creature shook his head, raising a slender hand to the side of his head and tapping where ears would be, if he had any. Zak nodded in return, shocked. Other demons around him rarely acknowledged his subtle alliance indicator as his crew were expected to avoid being seen. To have someone so nonchalantly point them out was a welcome change if it means Zak got free drinks. The pale white hand of the bar tender set the glass down in front of Zak, who nodded in silent thanks, bringing the drink to his lips. The bourbon burned his throat as he swallowed it, but it was smooth, definitely better than the swill Taz kept in their dorm. He scanned his eyes over the crowd, moving en mass as if it were a liquid. The bright lights in the dark room took some adjustment, but Zak could see better now that he's sat still for a while. He nursed his drink for a while, enjoying the people watching, occasionally spotting the brat come up to the other end of the bar before disappearing again into the sea of demons. A knot started forming in Zak's stomach, his instincts running wild, and he wasn't entirely sure why. He waited another five minutes, then almost like clockwork, he spotted Noah again. Only this time, he really paid attention to his appearance. He had dark bags under his eyes, stumbling over himself as he walked. His normally fluffy hair was showing signs of deflation and his skin glistened, almost like he was sweating profusely. Zak shivered, his protective instincts kicking in as he watched Noah get turned away by the imp behind the bar. He very subtly waved the pale creature over. The bar tender pointed first at Zak's nearly empty glass, but the large devil shook his head, beckoning the creature's head closer.  


“Is he okay?” he was shouting still.  


“It is rare that the child is ever okay.” the bar tender's voice was bone-chilling, cold and methodical. “I assume your employer has asked you keep an eye on him?”  


Zak nodded silently. The bar tender reached under the bar, sliding a small blue wristband across the wooden bar top to Zak.  


“This will allow you in without issue.” the ghast pointed to the curtain, “Wear it, and none will expect anything of you.”  


Zak wrapped the paper around his wrist, polishing off his drink and standing up. He again nodded to the bar tender, weaving through the crowd towards the dark curtain.

A slim female devil greeted Zak as he pulled the heavy fabric aside, making sure to use the hand with the wristband the bar tender had given him. She was significantly shorter than he was, her head just barely reaching the underside of his chest. She craned her neck up, staring at him through half-lidded eyes. A soft hand caressed his exposed forearm, it's owner inching closer,  


“How can I help you, handsome?”  


Zak shot his eyes down at the woman, gently pulling his arm away, “I'm not here for that.” he decided using his business voice would help deter any wandering hands, “I've been asked to keep an eye on someone.”  


The woman pulled her hand away as he spoke. Zak could feel her whole demeanor change as she processed his task. Soft red eyes fixated on the blue paper Zak bore on his wrist. The hostess turned on her heels, nodding, gesturing Zak over to the bar along the side of the dimly lit room.  


“I see, then you best have a seat.” her voice masked a thin veil of concern , “The shit show's already started.”  


The last few words were hard for Zak to fully make out, but based on her harsh, whispered tone, he was sure they weren't pleasant. He placed himself at the edge of the bar, taking in his new surroundings. The room had a dim, red glow, blending in perfectly with the mostly red and black furniture. Couches and bean bag chairs were scattered all around, along with low profile tables. Much like in the hallway leading into the club, small groups of lovers occupied many of the seats, engrossed in the throws of sex. Most of the demons Zak could see lacked clothing, the ones that did were dressed like Noah, where the cloth that covered them left little to the imagination. Zak felt a hot blush cross his cheeks, never a big fan of intimacy like this, and certainly not one to watch others engage in it. He turned his attention back to the bar, another ghast manned this one, though a sickly green as opposed to white. He waved the thin creature over, ordering another drink for himself. This one was less pleasant than his coworker on the main bar, but still treated Zak with the same respect. A familiar clear laugh pierced the silence of the room, drawing Zak's gaze clear over the bar to a small gathering of larger demons. Many of them had the same build as Zak, and smack in the middle was Noah, topless, seated in the lap of what Zak could best approximate to be a wolf-shaped demon. He had to pry his eyes from the heir's body, his blush deepening. The pictures Buzz showed him that morning suddenly had a whole new meaning as he sat and witnessed much of the same actions with his own eyes. The hostess caught Zak's attention as she sheepishly spoke with the heir. His head whipped around and locked eyes with Zak. He froze. The brilliant eyes he saw earlier were now pale, glazed over enough to see even from this distance. He watched Noah slide off his companion's lap, running one hand down the fluffy cheek as he stumbled over to Zak.  


“There you are Zakieee.” Noah landed in Zak's lap, unsure if on purpose or on accident. His voice still held the same clear ring, but his speech slurred, running words together at odd intervals and hanging on syllables longer than necessary, “I was wonderin' when you'd come in here.”  


“I came in here looking for you.” Zak sighed, taking in Noah's inebriatied state. The bags he saw earlier were even darker up close. A fine white powder dusted his upper lip, some dried blood mixed in as well. Buzz wasn't kidding, the brat really does go hard, “And I'm glad I did. We should get you home before you get yourself into more trouble.”  


“Aw come on Zakie I thought you were cool.” Noah nuzzled into Zak's chest, smearing make-up and whatever drug was on his face onto the large demon's shirt, “I thought we was friends.”  


“I seem to remember you saying quite clearly that we weren't friends.” He grabbed Noah's face with one hand, cupping the small demon's hot face, “How much have you had? You look awful.”  


“Oooooowwwww.” Noah staggered back, settling his weight heavily in his hips, “Only a litllleeee, no need to be so meeeeean.”  


“You've had more than a little princess.” Zak set his drink down on the bar. He stood, gently grabbing Noah's arm, “Come on, let's get you ho—”  


“Don' fucking touch me!” Noah shrieked, flinching back suddenly, “You're jus' gonna tell daddy I've been hittin' po'er again.”  


All eyes in the room turned on the two. The wolf Noah was with stomped over, possessively grabbing the small demon by the shoulders, “Come on man, he's fine the way he is,” his muzzle rested on the top of Noah's head, “Let him have his fun.”  


“He can barely stand up! His eyes are so bloodshot I'm surprised he can see at all! He puts anything else in his system and he could wind up dead!”  


“Oh yeah tough guy?” Noah snagged a straw off of a nearby table, waving it in Zak's general direction, “Fuckin' watch me.” He ripped himself out from under the wolf's grip, making his way back over to the table he was occupying.  


“Noah, don't do this.” Zak reached out again, but was blocked by some of the other patrons.  


“You. Ain't. My. Babysitter.” Noah pressed the straw into his nostril, sucking air through it, running the other end across the table. The wolf's face contorted in panic, racing over to Noah,  


“Wait! Babe that's not--”  


“_**Fuck!**_” Noah threw the straw on the ground, pressing his hand to his face. He cried out, blood pooling under his palm.  


Zak grabbed the wolf by the shoulder, turning him in his grip, his ears straining from Noah's pained wails, “What was that? What did he just take?”  


“Not something you snort, that's for damn sure.”  


The two turned back to Noah, who fell deadly silent. His eyes rolled back into his head, hands fell to his sides as he started to waver on his hooves. White bile started bubbling up from his mouth, blood streaming steadily from his nose. Zak lunged forward, catching the small demon as he crumpled to the floor, screaming for a medic. Panic swept through the room, the other onlookers rushing out past the curtain. The group Noah was with mobbed Zak, trying to pry the dying demon from his iron grip. The large demon whipped his head around wildly, looking for the imp that manned the bar, but the room was empty. He hoisted Noah up into a cradle, bolting past the small mob of men and the heavy curtain that separated the two rooms. The panic had spread into the rest of the club, halting the music ad making moving through the crowd much harder. Zak continued to cry out over the chaos, hoping to grab the attention of the ghast at the main bar. Other patrons watched as the large demon held Noah's convulsing body, some shaking their heads as the made way for Zak to pass. The white imp was already on the other side of the bar by the time Zak made it to him. He held a small black bag in his long hands, setting it down gently on the bar top and beckoning Zak to place himself and Noah on the floor. The bar tender pulled a small vile out of the bag, along with a very long, thick needle. He inserted the needle into the inverted vile, drawing out some of the contents into the syringe,  


“This must pierce through his chest.” his voice was hushed, probably not the first time he's had to do this. Zak nodded, gripping Noah under his armpits, securing him for the shot. “Once it enters, you must release him. He will enter a state of extreme distress and may injure himself further.”  


“Just do it already!” Zak snapped, “We don't have time!”  


The bar tender lifted the needle up above his head, aiming his shot before slamming the point into Noah's sternum, pressing the plunger as it punctured the bone. Noah's eyes narrowed back to thin slits, a blood curdling scream ripping from his throat 

followed by a sharp gasping for air. He flung himself from Zak's grip, leaning forward onto the ground. Zak cautiously approached the heir, letting him catch his breath.  


“Noah?” he tried calling out to the small convulsing form, “Noah, you alright?”  


He merely turned his head back towards Zak, opening his mouth to respond, but instead retching, yellowish-white bile spilling from his mouth, He almost landed in the puddle beneath him, but Zak caught him, pulling him up into his arms. “Alright, party's over princess.”  


He stood up from the ground, offering the bar tender a thank you before carrying an unconscious Noah toward the exit. All eyes were on him as he made his way through the crowd that had gathered. He noticed several phones and cameras aimed in their direction, and he shifted his grip so the bile covered heir couldn't be singled out as easily. Zak began concocting a plan for getting back home. He remembered where Noah had parked when they arrived downtown, but he wasn't sure if he'd be able to safely drive them both back. Zak never had a need to learn how to drive, usually relying on walking or public transportation in his youth, and now having access to chauffeurs. He shifted the small figure into one arm, settling his head and shoulders against Zak's. He pulled his phone from his pocket, unlocking it before finding Taz's number in his contacts and dialing. It rang in his ear a couple of times before he heard Taz on the other end,  


“Zak? Where the hell are you? Do you have any idea what time it is?”  


“I knew you'd be awake.” Zak's voice was strained from all the shouting, “Shit's gone down dude, I need you and Talon to meet me downtown.”  


“Why? And why Talon?” Taz was shockingly calm, “Where are you anyway?”  


Zak stepped onto the quiet city street, glancing around, looking for a cross section to give Taz, “I'm on Midway and Olympic, I need a ride back and someone to get Noah's car before it's impounded.”  


“Alright, stay there, we'll be there in ten.”  


The phone clicked. Zak sighed, sticking his phone back in his pocket before readjusting Noah into a cradle. The small demon groaned, cracking his eyes open. “Hey.”  


Zak looked down at the brat, maintaining his stern features, “Welcome back princess.”  


Noah simply scoffed, nestling into Zak's arms. Zak moved to a bench under a covered bus stop, sitting down himself before trying to set Noah down. But the lithe demon grabbed Zak's shoulders, shaking his head, “Please...just a little longer...it's helping me stay grounded...” the large demon relented, keeping Noah in his lap, “I...I'm glad you're here...I don't wanna think about what would've happened if you weren't...”  


“Don't mention it.” Zak fired back curtly, staring off down the street.  


The two sat in silence for a moment, processing what had just transpired. Zak looked down at Noah, the dark bags under his eyes surrounded by runny eyeliner. His hair was all over the place, bruises covered his cheeks and neck, a far cry from the well groomed heir he had met that afternoon. For the first time all day, he saw pain in Noah's eyes, their usual color slowly coming back as his high subsided. He wanted to pry, get some explanation for why such a politically powerful, borderline famous demon felt the need to do this to himself. Maybe it was just in Zak's nature to find broken people. After all, it's happened before, and it only brought him more pain. Memories flashed in front of him, cradling his ex just like this, such a tender gesture that he missed dearly. He quickly moved Noah off of him, setting him on the bench beside him, scooting away to the other end of the bench. He fought back tears, his heart rate picking up again, one hand grabbing his cheek. He screwed his eyes shut, clenching his free hand into a tight ball. Zak could feel his heart crying out to him, to let him feel these emotions again for someone else, anyone else.  


“Zak?” he was hearing his ex in his head again, calling out in his sickly sweet voice, “Zak, what's wrong?”  


His eyes widened as a hand touched his shoulder, whipping his head to the side, panicked eyes falling back on Noah's disheveled face. Despite the blood, bruises, and makeup smearing it, his face was soft, full of concern. The large demon turned his whole body away, but Noah grabbed his face, pulling him back,  


“You don't have to talk to me, but you do need to breathe.”  


Zak took in a deep shaky breath, letting it out slowly, tears disobeying him as they rolled down his cheeks. He quickly wiped them away, his face returning to its default stare.  


“You feelin' okay Noah?” he deflected, returning his hands to his knees, “You seem to be coming back around.”  


“So we're just gonna ignore your anxiety attack?” Noah pulled his hand back, scooting closer to Zak. “I know I have my own issues, and you don't need to tell me why, but...after everything you've done for me...”  


“It's okay Noah.” Zak bounced his knee, “I'm just glad you're...alive.” he wanted to say alright, but he knew the small demon was far from alright, “Tell you what, I'll ignore your overdose if you ignore my break down.” Zak smirked, face still red from the tears, “Deal?”  


Noah paused, chewing the inside of his cheek, “Deal.”  


Silence returned between them. Noah rested his head on Zak's shoulder, causing the large demon to flinch slightly. He place a hand on Noah's back, rubbing it lightly.  


“I'm sorry you had to see all that.” his voice was hoarse, “I never meant to go that far...” tears welled up in the young demon's eyes, “You must think I'm some bratty whore...”  


Zak took in a sharp breath, “No...I don't. I knew what I was getting into when I agreed to come with you. “ he held in his sass, not wanting to further upset Noah, pausing for a moment before continuing, “You just seem like...you're hurting. I've seen it before.”  


“...is it that obvious?”  


“I don't know,” he looked back down at Noah, “You're the one who's taking all the drugs and bleeding from the nose.” more tears formed, “I'm sorry, please don't cry.” he wiped away some of Noah's tears.  


The small demon started to laugh, “You're such an asshole.” he nuzzled deeper into Zak's shoulder.  


“If I had a nickel every time I heard that.”  


Noah paused between rushed bits of weak laughter, “I'm assuming you're gonna tell Papa about tonight?”  


“I would be really bad at my job if I didn't.” Zak spotted headlights heading towards them, “What do you think he'd do”  


“Probably nothing.” Noah started to shake, tears falling steadily, “I don't think he knows how to handle me...handle this...” his voice squeaked, “I'm just a burden to him...”  


“Hey...that's not true.” Zak pulled Noah closer, for the first time in months, able to provide someone comfort while ignoring his pained memories, “Do you want him to do something?” Noah nodded in response, “Then let's tell him together. You don't have to do this alone.”  


Noah shoved his face into the crook of Zak's arm, sobbing heavily, “I...I don't want to do this anymore Zak...”  


The large demon scooped Noah back up again, hushing him softly. He rose up from the bench as a blacked out sedan pulled to a stop. Tazgon appeared out of the passenger side door, standing up slowly to meet the pair.  


“What the hell happened?” Taz looked over the two demons, “You guys look like you went through all seven circles.”  


“It's a long story Taz.” Zak placed Noah in the back seat of the car, “I'll explain during the meeting tomorrow.”  


“I think the boss needs to hear about it more than I do, dude. Skip it.” he held his hand out expectantly. “You got his keys?”  


Zak pulled a small key chain from his pocket and placed it in Taz's open palm, “Car's in the lot a block from here, bright red, can't miss it.” he walked around to the other side of the car, sliding in beside Noah. The small demon was nodding off in his seat. 

He caught Talon staring at them in the rear view mirror, his signature toothy grin on his face, “Got somethin' to say Smiley?”  


“Nah, man. Just enjoyin' the view.” the drake pressed the gas pedal, heading back towards the estate, “Gotta say Zak, missed seein' you smile.”

He carried the sleeping Noah back to his room, pushing the door open with his shoulder. A large king-sized bed sat snug against the left-hand wall, an attached bathroom directly adjacent. A lone couch sat underneath a large bay window, a couple of small plushies set upon it. Everything in the room was either black or red, giving the whole space an intimate atmosphere. He moved towards the bed, setting Noah down on the plush surface, wiping some stray hair out of his face. The small devil looked so peaceful like this, his face full of color again. Zak sighed, pulling himself away from the bed and toward the door. A gentle tug on his tail stopped him in his tracks.  


“Wait.” Noah pleaded weakly, “Please, don't go.”  


Zak turned around, looking down at Noah in confusion.  


“I promise, I won't touch you or anything, I just...” tears welled up in Noah's eyes, his body shaking, “I just...I can't be alone...I just can't...” he grabbed Zak's tail with both hands, tears hitting the sheets, “Please?”  


Zak sighed heavily. More flashes of his memories surfaced, a mild panic causing his heart rate to rise a little, but Zak kept his composure, smiling down at Noah,“I'll stay on the couch. But you should try and sleep.” he crossed the carpeted floor, kicking his shoes off before sitting down on the couch.  


Noah rose from the bed, grabbing a pillow and carrying it over to Zak, “Here, the arm of that isn't all that comfortable.” he handed the cushion over, “I don't have an extra blanket unfortunately.”  


“That's okay.” Zak moved the plushies to the floor, placing the pillow under his head as he laid back, “You go sleep.”  


Noah gave him a weak smile before he clicked off the light, climbing back into bed. “We're still gonna talk to Papa tomorrow...right?”  


“Of course princess,” Zak cracked an eye open, expecting to have another pillow thrown at him. Instead he saw Noah simply sitting up in bed staring at him, “No snappy comeback this time?”  


“I don't know,” Noah laid back against his bedding, “It's growing on me.”


	3. Broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remember kids, don't bottle up frustrations. Problems don't go away if you don't talk about them

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's couple mentions of uncensored fa***t in here so heads up

His head was pounding when he woke up. It felt like someone was trying to rip his head apart by the horns and was slowly making progress. A soft light filtered through the room through the thick black-out curtains, meaning it was probably some time around noon. He sat up in bed, propping up his lithe figure with one arm, the other massaging his eyes. Everything was blurry, partly from sleep, and partly from being so hungover. Noah turned his head toward the bay window, finding the couch beneath it empty, the pillow he'd given Zak placed neatly under his plushies. His heart sank, flopping himself back against the bed. He curled his knees up into his chest, memories of the previous night coming back in quick flashes. He started to shake. Zak probably went to talk to Dernazas without him and they were just gonna lock him up without even asking. Noah buried his face into his pillows, pulling the blanket back up over his head. Maybe if he stayed in bed long enough the two would think he died during the night and he could avoid all the repercussions. The gentle click of his bedroom door opening then closing smashed that theory. A faint smell of eggs wafted under his nose, causing the small demon to peek his head out from under the blanket.  


“You up Noah?” it was Zak, “I figured you should eat something before we go see your old man.”  


Noah slowly pulled the blanket down, rolling onto his back before sitting up. He eyed Zak as the large demon sat at the edge of the bed, placing the small plate in his lap. He had his usual uniform on again, only with a dark blue shirt, but worn the same way. He must've gotten up hours ago and changed. Noah looked away, shame and embarrassment flooding his face. After everything the built devil did for him last night, he was ashamed to think Zak would just go behind Noah's back. The smell of breakfast was becoming more and more intoxicating as Noah avoided eye contact. His stomach growled, just loud enough that Zak probably heard it. The low chuckle of the other proved Noah's point.  


“Boss said the best way to put you in a better mood was to feed ya. Glad to see he was right.” he set the plate down on the bed in front of Noah, “I didn't poison it, I promise.”  


Noah giggled on reflex, his silence breaking as he looked down at the food in front of him. “You made it?”  


“Of course I did. I'm not completely useless you know.”  


He cautiously raised a small bite of egg to his mouth, sliding it off the fork by his lips. As he processed the taste, his eyes opened up more, waking up a little more as he chewed. Without even thinking he shoveled more into his face faster than he could swallow it. Zak simply laughed harder, placing a hand on the bed between them, “Noah, slow down, you're gonna choke.”  


“It's really good.” Noah covered his mouth, words muffled by the amount of food he held on his tongue. He swallowed the rest, setting the empty plate back down on the bed.  


“I'm surprised you could even taste it you inhaled it so fast.” Zak stood up, grabbing the plate, “You get dressed. I'll wait for you in the living room.”  


“I'll just throw something on real fast.” Noah threw the rest of the blanket off of him, swinging his legs back over the mattress and onto the floor. He staggered a little as he stood, his migraine reminding him how much he hurt. His chest burned, the injection site red and puffy against his skin. The room started to spin, the ringing in his ears drowning out sound as he fell back on the bed. He gripped his forehead in one hand as he sat on the mattress edge, matted up tail tucked underneath him from the stumble backward. He still had his shorts on from last night at least, so Zak didn't have to see any more of his body than he had already. The tall demon was beside him again.  


“Easy now.” he placed a shaky hand on Noah's shoulder.  


“Ya know, for someone so touchy, you sure do flinch a lot.” Noah smirked through his headache.  


“Glad to see your mouth still functions.” Zak stood in front of him, “Why don't I get you something to cover you up while you come back to reality a little?”  


Noah gestured to a wardrobe beside the bathroom, “Just grab a sweater from there. No one else is gonna be seein' me today anyway.” he rubbed his temples, screwing his eyes shut. The sound of the wardrobe opening and closing, hangers scraping along the metal hanging rod, even the clothes hitting each other as Zak rifled trough them grated on Noah's sensitive ears. A soft pile of fabric landed on his head, covering Noah's face as he opened his eyes back up. He pulled the cream colored sweater into his hands, shooting Zak a glare before pulling it over him, sticking his arms through the loose sleeves. The garment hung loose on Noah's small frame, exposing most of his shoulders. The sleeves hung down past Noah's hands, looking more like flippers than sleeves. He rose up off the mattress, slower this time, letting his body adjust to the movement. The rest of the sweater fell around his hips, covering the rest of his torso. The bottom hem of his shorts stuck out under the thick wool. He walked up to Zak, “Okay, let's go.”  


“Uh, Noah, you might wanna wash your face or something first.”  


Noah scrunched his face up in confusion. He plodded over the the full length mirror on the wall, recoiling in shock as he studied his face. Fingers ghosted over the bags under his eyes, moving down to his nose, dried blood covering his upper lip and jawline. It was sticky, the excess powder from last night clinging to his skin. Black streams ran down his cheeks from his eyes, the makeup he had on leaving prominent stripes.  


“Christ...” Noah continued to paw at his face, almost like he had to constantly feel it, trying to process if it was real, “I look like shit.”  


“It was worse last night.” Zak chimed in from over by the door, “I at least got the vomit off you during the ride home.”  


Noah silently moved into the bathroom, grabbing a washcloth off the shelf beside the sink and wetting it. He ran the warm towel over his features, gently scrubbing last nights regrets from his skin. He spotted Zak in the mirror, leaning against the door frame. Setting the washcloth on the counter, he turned to look at him.  


“I'm sure this is super interesting for you tough guy.” Noah dried his face with his bath towel.  


“It's not, just making sure you don't collapse.” The small demon moved back towards the door, shoving Zak with his shoulder as he passed, “Ow, jeez. Okay I get it, you're feeling better.”  


Noah scoffed, letting out a light giggle as he led Zak out into the living room, making their way to Dernazas’ study on the other end of the house. Zak was flirting again. Why else would the grizzled demon bother making so many jabs at Noah’s expense? Or for that matter, invite himself along to a party he clearly didn’t want to go to, just to make sure the heir made it back. It couldn’t just be him following orders. The rest of the goons Zak associated with cared only about themselves and occasionally each other. No other of them would’ve done half of the stuff Zak did for him last night, probably would’ve let the small demon die from the overdose without a second thought. At least, that’s his impression of them anyway. This is the longest Noah had ever spent with one of his father’s men, it wouldn’t be fair to judge them all based on the one negative interaction. Maybe it’d be better if he assumed all of them were like Zak. Through his hazy memory, Noah recalled the conversation he had with Zak on the bench. And then remembered seeing the larger demon tremble and cry, so distraught over him that he couldn’t even keep Noah in his grip. It’s the first actual emotion he’d seen Zak make the whole time he’s known him, and it scared Noah to think it’s the only one he was able to show. Sure he’d seen the large demon smirk and laugh, but he couldn’t recall seeing any actual joy on that stoic face. Only fear, and distress. Coupled with how jumpy Zak was at even the lightest touch, he had to wonder what else the assassin was hiding. He rubbed his hands along his arms as he walked, nervousness creeping in and mixing with his hypothesizing. Something else from last night crept in as well, a voice he didn’t recognize playing back in his head, “He’s fine the way he is, let him have his fun.” A shiver ran down Noah’s spine, hugging himself tighter. He couldn’t remember how many guys he was with last night, but the only one he could remember being there when he came back into consciousness, was Zak. This other voice must’ve been from before he passed out, someone all too eager to see the heir indisposed, able to do whatever they wanted with him. He stopped in his tracks, his legs refusing to take another step. His eyes stayed fixated on the floor between his hooves, becoming blurry as tears started forming.  


“You nervous?” He looked up, Zak was staring at him, still holding the same blank expression, but at this point Noah learned to look into his eyes to search for emotion. Concern. Noah shook his head, looking back at the floor, “Well I can’t help you unless you tell me.” Noah opened his mouth to speak, but his throat dried out, a soft cry eking out instead. He started to cry openly, hugging himself tighter still. “Shhhh, you don’t have to be nervous.” Zak’s voice was gentle, hushed, much different in tone than before, “Remember, you don’t have to do this alone, I’ll be right here.”  


“Why?” Zak blinked in confusion, Noah’s question coming out between labored breaths, “Why are you being so…nice to me?” Zak knelt down beside the trembling devil, placing a hand on Noah’s arm, “No one’s ever…” the rest of his sentence died out, the crying interrupting him.  


“I…I’m not really sure either. You seemed to genuinely want to change when we spoke last night. Do you still want that?” Noah nodded, wiping tears from his eyes with one of his sleeves, “I think I know how to help you, and I don’t know why but…” Zak sighed heavily, looking away, “Something is…compelling me. I don’t know what it is yet but, all I know now is that someone with a lot of pain needs help. And when I can’t take care of myself, I take care of others.”  


Noah giggled between bouts of tears, “That has to be the weirdest thing I’ve ever heard come from a killer's mouth.” Zak shook his head, “But you seem…sweet. And…I think I can trust you.”  


“I wiped vomit from your face and brought you back from near death, I would hope you can trust me.”  


Noah laughed harder, his tears no longer blurring his vision. He wiped the rest away with his sleeves, “I don’t think you’re gonna like what you hear when we talk to Papa…” Noah’s smile faded again, resuming his stride across the hardwood floor, “Maybe it would be better if I spoke to him alone.”  


“Better, maybe. But is that something you want to do?” Noah paused for a moment, chewing his lip. He shook his head, “Then I’ll be in there with you. I’m sure he wants to hear about last night anyway.”  


Noah glanced down at Zak’s hand. His body screamed out for physical contact to help calm him, but knowing how jumpy the large demon is, he hesitated, “Would he alright if…” he reached for the hand with his own, “If I held your hand?” He blushed, his shame returning, “I just…really need someone right now.” Zak started at Noah, eyes widening ever so slightly. His hand twitched. It seemed like Zak wanted to say yes, but something kept the word from leaving his lips. Noah withdrew his hand, hugging himself again. “I’m sorry…I know it’s dumb…”  


“No, it’s alright.” Zak extended his hand, gently wrapping his fingers around Noah’s delicate ones, “Better?” The small demon nodded slowly.  


Another weak smile crawled across Noah’s face. He ran his thumb over Zak’s hard knuckles. His skin was rough, and there was a distinct lack of hair on any of him. He expected the surface to be smoother, but Noah assumed it was a life of hard labor that kept it dry. Drawing in a deep breath, Noah pulled the handle of one of the doors to his father’s study. The door creaked open, and he pulled his new friend inside with him.  


“Noah?” Dernazas’ gravely voice greeted them as the door opened, allowing the two to pass though into the office, “I wasn’t expecting to see you pumpkin.” His eyes drifted up to Zak, “And…Zakamin? What’s going on?”  


“Papa…I…” Noah desperately searched for an appropriate way to start, “I um…” he turned around, deciding instead to try and escape, “I can’t do this.”  


“Yes you can,” Zak spoke in a harsh whisper, tightening his grip around Noah’s hand.  


The small demon broke again, tears and sobs falling from his face. He heard the heavy footsteps of his father moving over to them quickly, wrapping his arms around his quaking form. Noah buried his face into his father’s sweater, dry, desperate sobs muffled by the wool. A strong hand held the back of his head, petting his hair gently, “Hush now child…Papa’s right here.”  


“Papa I…I’m so sorry.” Noah gasped between sobs, “I…I was so scared and….and…”  


“Boss,” Zak spoke quietly, “I think we should all sit down. There’s something we need to talk about.”  
Dernazas looked up at Zak, concern and confusion mixing on his features. Noah composed himself enough to stand up on his own, prying himself from his father’s comforting grip. The Don pulled his chair around his desk, placing it so he could sit closer to the two young demons, who themselves sat in the guest chairs. Noah settled his hands in his lap, toying with his sleeves, eyes tracing the pattern of the stitching. Zak sighed, leaning forward as he spoke to Dernazas,  


“Boss…something happened last night. Something…pretty awful.”  


“What do you mean?” The Don looked back at Noah, the heir’s face growing hotter by the second, “Nollahar…what did you do?”  


Zak swallowed hard, unprepared to reveal the news, “He…he overdosed last night, sir.” Noah’s hands flew back to his face, the shame and embarrassment forcing him to curl up into a ball in his chair, “We almost lost him too…”  


“Papa…I’m…I’m…so sor-sorry…” Noah fired off apologies as quickly as his tongue would allow, broken up by the hiccups and sobs, “I, I, I never me-meant to take so, so much, it was…it was an a..a…”  


“Noah.” Dernazas reached out and grabbed both of his child’s hands, “You promised me Noah, you promised me no more!”  


“I…I know Papa I ju…just… it helps…helps me forget…forget…”  


“Do you want me to lose you too? Do you have any idea how close it came to that?” The Boss was losing his temper, “Were you even thinking about that?”  


“Boss! Please, this isn’t about you.” Zak tried to interject, but a dangerous claw pointed straight at him.  


“Stay out of this!” The Don turned his attention back to the distraught Noah, “What would your mother think if she saw you grieving her death like this?”  


Noah’s sobs devolved into wails, heavy screams that ripped through his throat as he lost all inhibition. Words melted into incoherent babble. Zak huffed, puffing out his chest, steadying himself.  


“Boss, he’s come to you for help.”  


“How do you know?” Dernazas shot daggers at Zak, “Don’t you dare claim to know more about my child than me!”  


“You sat idly by and watched as he drank, injected and snorted his way to an early grave, and you accuse me of interfering?”  


“How dare you speak to me that way!” The Don shot up from his seat, “How I handle my child is my business!”  


“Father! Stop!” Noah cried out, a moment of clarity amidst the sobs.  


Dernazas’ rage filled eyes darted back to Noah, “You stay quiet! I’ll deal with you next!”  


“How?” Noah stood as well, balling up his fists, the sleeves of his sweater folding in with his knuckles, “How are you gonna deal with me? Fold under my tears like you always do? Like you did the first time I came to you for help?”  


“Noah…” Zak placed a hand on the small demon’s shoulder.  


“This went on for _two fucking years_ and _now_ you’re deciding to _finally_ be my father? Where were you the first time I OD’d? Or the first time I ended up in the hospital from alcohol poisoning?” The Don stared in stunned silence as his child berated him,_“Where were you when Mother died?”_  


“Nollahar, that’s enough.”  


Noah slapped Zak’s hand from his shoulder, taking an aggressive step towards his father, “You hid! You ran and hid like a coward behind your precious business! You didn’t even ask me if I needed help! You just _watched me crumble.”_ He was snarling, venting two years worth of frustration, “And what did you do when I came to you for comfort? You gave me a job! Like any good father dealing with a grieving child, you gave me a job.”  


“I gave you work to keep you busy.” Dernazas hissed through clenched teeth.  


“You gave me work so you wouldn’t have to deal with me! You were so ashamed of me that you hid me away in city hall, keeping me from the friends you disapproved of!”  


“I _**never**_ said I was ashamed of you.” The Don stared down his heir, “Don’t you dare say that to me Nollahar. Who do you think paid for your surgeries? Who housed you, clothed you? Who made every effort to be supportive when you told me about your dysphoria?”  


“Don’t twist this around to make me look like the bad guy!”  


“Turning to addiction was your choice Nollahar, don’t act like this is my fault!”  


Noah’s hand moved all on its own, slapping his father firmly across the face. Stunned silence choked the air out of the three demons, Noah panting heavily as he recoiled his hand. Dernazas turned his head slowly back to Noah, voice filled with venom, 

“You. Ungrateful, little whore.”  


Rage blinded the small demon as he lunged at his father with all his might, claws scratching at the ancient devil’s face and neck. He pinned Dernazas to the desk, landing a volley of blows into his cheeks and nose. Zak grabbed Noah by the waist, pulling him off The Don. Noah flailed in the muscular grip, hands and hooves flying in every direction.  


“I HATE YOU! YOU DON’T LOVE ME YOU BASTARD!”  


“Zakamin,” Dernazas ordered, touching his fingers to the fresh cuts on his face, “I think he needs to return to his room. Maybe once he’s cooled off he can speak to me like an adult.”  


“LET ME GO!” Noah continued to fight against Zak, “WE’RE NOT DONE!”  


“Noah.” Zak’s stern voice shook Noah to his core. “I think you’ve said enough.” Noah continued to glare at his father as Zak removed him from the study. He kicked at Zak’s legs, still trying to squirm free. “Yeah, that’s not gonna happen pipsqueak.”  


“Let me go you asshole!” Noah screamed, “I don’t need you! I don’t need anyone!” Zak pushed Noah’s bedroom door open again, waiting until he shut it and could block it to set the heated demon on the ground. Noah immediately turned around, banging against Zak’s chest with the sides of his fists, “I don’t need you! I don’t…I don’t…” he fell back into his sobbing, pressing his forearms against the broad chest, his forehead falling between his hands. He felt the body under him tense up, his arms shifting into the same protective stance he held yesterday at city hall. Noah expected the large demon to wrap his arms around him, to comfort him, but he felt nothing. He craned his neck up, Zak’s face blank again, looking at him, nothing in his eyes either. Noah shoved off him, throwing his arms down to his sides, “WHY?? ANGER, SADNESS, FUCKING ANYTHING JUST STOP STARING AT ME LIKE THAT!”  


“Noah.” There was that voice again, stern, like a disappointed father, “You should lie down. You need to calm down.”  


“Don’t fucking tell me to calm down!” Noah jabbed his fist into Zak’s chest again, he flinched, “This was all your fucking idea in the first place!”  
Nothing. Noah started pounding on the chest again, tantrum still in full force. Nothing. Defeated, he rested against the hit man again, tears hitting his shirt. He felt Zak draw in a shaky breath. Anger and confusion bubbled up again,  


“I don’t understand!”  


His head cocked to the side.  


“Why are you so afraid of me?” Zak’s eye twitched. Looks like Noah was finding the wall’s weak spot, “I can beat on you with all my might and you don’t even bat an eye! But as soon as I come to you for comfort you jump and flinch like…”  


“Like what?”  


“I don’t know! Like I’m gonna hurt you by hugging you!  


“We aren’t talking about me right now, Noah.” Finally, something wavered in Zak’s voice, “Go lie down.”  


Noah wrapped his arms around Zak, testing something. He felt the broad chest rise and fall a little faster, his breathing becoming more labored. The heartbeat under his skin quickened, the whole form starting to tremble. Noah tightened his grip, determined to experience some kind of reaction from the stoic devil.  


“Noah, please, let go.” His voice hushed, trembling almost as much as his body was.  


The small demon unwrapped himself from Zak and backed up , a realization dawning on him, “You ARE afraid of me!” He took a cautious step closer, his face contorting into one filled with venom, “I get it now. You LIKE me!”  


Zak averted his eyes, a blush starting to form on his face. His expression was breaking.  


“Yeah, that’s it! You don’t wanna admit to yourself you have feelings for me!” Noah continued to torment his friend, “You’re probably still in the closet to everyone but yourself, and even you don’t wanna believe you could fall for another guy.”  


“You don’t know _**anything**_ about me.” Zak spat back, his expression twisting into anger.  


“That’s why you want me to sober up isn’t it? You hate the fact that you’re crushing on someone so fucked up. You want me to be a _project.”_  


“That’s not true.”  


“Don’t lie to me, I’ve fucked enough of the guys in this city to know a fucking hard on when I feel one! You popped one last night when you held me in your lap, and that terrified you!”  


“Noah. That’s enough.”  


“Go on then! Tell me the real reason you wanted to go to the club with me last night! I would love to know why you feel like you need to protect someone you barely know, someone you flirted with excessively all damn day!”  


“Don’t you-“ He was starting to crack  


“Tell me!”  


“You don’t-“  


“TELL ME!”  


“BECAUSE IM TIRED OF SEEING YOU DESTROY YOURSELF ISSAC!” That was it. Zak’s façade crumbled. His hands whipped from his back to his face, gripping his temples as his cry ripped through the room  


Noah froze, blinking up at Zak. The hurt in Zak’s eyes, widened, laced with pain. “Who…” he didn’t get to finish his thought before the large demon grabbed Noah roughly by the arm, dragging him to the bed. “HEY! Let me go!” Zak threw him into the mattress before whipping around and stomping back toward the door, “GET BACK HERE!”  


“You need to fucking check yourself, you petulant brat.” Zak opened the door, hinges straining from the force.  


“WE AREN’T DONE YET!” Noah scrambled off the bed, trying to reach Zak before the door slammed in his face, “GET BACK IN HERE YOU…YOU…FAGGOT!”  


There was a pause, “Takes one to know one asshole.” It was muffled through the closed doors, but it pierced Noah’s thoughts nonetheless. The small demon crumpled to the floor, hiding his face in his sleeves, wailing in agony as the only other demon who ever cared about him, abandoned him. He pushed too far, he let his anger get away from him, and it may have cost him the only helping hand he’d ever get. An itch covered his whole body, a thousand invisible bugs crawling under his skin. He rubbed his arms, trying to calm himself, his body crying out for a release. Noah rose from the ground, pacing the room. He could still feel Zak’s presence from the other side of the door, so there was no going out that way. He rushed to his nightstand, throwing the drawers open and digging through the contents. There had to be something somewhere that he could take. Anything to take his mind off the vile words he spilled from his mouth. But there was nothing. Noah sat back down on his bed, rocking his body back and forth, cradling himself trying to steady his erratic heartbeat. He picked at his thighs with his claws, pinching one spot over and over again until it bled. It was something, but not enough. He dragged the pointed nails along the sheets, that was better. He moved to his knees beside the bed, digging his claws in as far as they’d go and pulling, tearing the sheets apart with ease, the feeling of ripping through fabric giving him a mild distraction. He continued to sob openly as he tore apart his bedding. Bits of destroyed fabric littered the top of the mattress as he moved along the whole surface. He climbed back on top of it, reaching across as far as he could reach and pulling back, leaving a huge hole in the center of the bed. Laying out like that started to calm Noah, the small demon letting his cries fall onto the maimed sheets. He curled up on himself, gripping his knees and rocking up and down, the soothing motion finally letting sleep overtake his mind.  


It was nighttime when Noah awoke again. He blinked through bleary eyes down at his bed. He must’ve completely destroyed it after his blowout. Noah sighed, rolling off the bed. He glanced at the clock, it was almost eleven. He’d slept through pretty much the whole day. Wiping excess sleep and a few stray tears from his eyes, he checked his phone, having not moved it from his nightstand the previous night. Nothing. No messages from anyone, not even his father. His heart sank. He pulled his knees back up into his chest in the mattress edge, letting himself cry softly again, but they were dry, no more tears left in his body to shed. Pale eyes wandered to his door, wondering if Zak was still standing guard outside. Noah peeled himself off the bed, slowly walking across the carpet. He cracked his door open, but was greeted with darkness. The lights in the house were all shut off, everyone having retired for the night. He turned on the flashlight on his phone, crossing into the darkened living room, the click of his hooves against the hardwood echoing through the empty space. Scanning the room with the light, he turned to the stairs on his right, beginning his assent to his father’s room. He knew the old demon would be awake still, and Noah refused to wait until morning to apologize. The top floor of the house was darkened too, moonlight filtering in through the windows just enough to cast a milky glow. He approached the doors to his father’s bedroom, knocking against the wood hesitantly.  


“Papa?” He called out weakly, “Can I come in?”  


There was a pause before the door opened, Dernazas meeting him in the entryway, face covered in shallow scratches and a couple bruises from Noah’s earlier assault. He drew in a breath, opening the door wider to let Noah inside. The small demon slinked past his father, more carpet meeting his feet as he moved. As the door clicked shut behind them, The Don sat down on his bed. He patted the space beside him, encouraging Noah to sit.  


“Papa…I”  


“No…Noah…let me start.” His father drew in another breath, “I know…I haven’t been there for you…and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to apologize enough for abandoning you.”  


“You didn’t abandon me Papa,” he placed a hand on his father’s shoulder.  


“I was selfish. I was so blinded by my own grief I refused to believe anyone else could possibly understand how I felt, so I hid. It was cowardly of me…to think my own flesh and blood wouldn’t understand…” his voice started to shake, “I’ve been a horrible father.”  


“Papa…” Noah wrapped his arms around Dernazas. “I couldn’t have asked for a better one.” He cupped his father’s cheek, “If anyone should be apologizing, it should be me. I said so many awful things to you…”  


“It’s alright child, I know you didn’t mean any of it.”  


“But, it’s not alright…” Noah curled up on himself again, resting against his father, “I…I don’t like who I’ve become…I can’t believe I let such horrible, vile words slip like that…”  


“Shhhh…” Dernazas pet Noah’s hair, holding the small demon gently.  


“I don’t want to be like this anymore Papa…I want to be better…I just don’t know how…”  


“Well,” The Don sighed heavily, “Maybe the first step is to get you clean.” Noah nodded along silently. “And, maybe some time away from all this will do you some good. But I think you owe someone else an apology first.” Noah curled in further, thinking back to his fight with Zak.  


Dernazas reached for a small book on his nightstand, flipping it open and rifling through the pages. He held the book to Noah, Zak’s true name and a phone number written neatly on the page.  


“He came and spoke with me again after your spat. We’ve agreed to help you, but he wants to see how committed you are to this first.”  


Noah’s face grew hot, recalling the desperation in Zak’s scream. He took the book from his father, quickly typing the number into his phone to save it. It was too late in the day to try and call Zak, so he resolved to text him when he got back to his room. 

He felt his father rub his arm again, pulling him in tight.  


“He seems to have taken a liking to you Noah. I’ve known the lad for years and I haven’t seen him like this in quite some time. He really seems to care about you.” Noah blushed, a soft smile growing on his face. “I’m going to get some sleep pumpkin. You should call Zakamin, I’m sure he’s awake.”  


“Okay Papa.” Noah unfurled himself, kissing his father’s cheek as he stood up, “Thank you. And…I’m sorry…”  


“It’s alright. We’re going to get through this okay?”  


Noah nodded, taking slow strides back out the door into the hallway. He flipped his phone around in his hands again, turning the flashlight back on to head back downstairs.  


Flicking on the light switch beside the landing, the living room became filled with a soft yellow glow, the chandelier overhead illuminating the room. Noah was the only one who lived on this floor, the only other doored off room being his father’s study, so he could keep lights on without disturbing anyone. He moved into the kitchen, flicking on another switch to add more light. Pulling open one of the cabinets, he scanned for something to nibble on while he talked to Zak. He settled on a granola bar, unwrapping it and taking a small bite as he sat at the island in the middle of the kitchen, the bar stool creaking under even his light weight. He opened Zak’s contact in his phone, grabbing the number and entering it into his messages. Noah figured texting him first was smarter than just calling him, just in case the large demon wasn’t in the mood to talk.  


_Hey. I said some pretty awful stuff to you earlier…I just wanted to you know I didn’t mean any of it…_  


He shook his head, deleting the message and starting again,  


_Hey, it’s Noah. You’re probably sleeping or still mad at me or both, and you have every right to be, but I wanted to apologize. If you’re awake, call me. If not, call me when you read this. I think it’s better if I do it in person rather than over text._  


Satisfied, he hit send, shoving the rest of his snack in his face. He set the phone down on the counter, standing back up to get some water. It buzzed against the marble. Then buzzed again. He flipped it back over,  


_I’m still up._  


_Can I come up and see you?_  
He smiled, Yeah, I’m in the kitchen.  


After a few moments of silence, a door clicking along with footsteps on the hardwood reached Noah’s ears. A soft plodding up the stairs followed close behind, Zak’s horns poking up as he neared the top. As he stepped into view, Noah looked away, not having the strength to look at his friend without crying. Were they friends? A friend would pull him off his father in a fit of rage. A friend would comfort him when he needed it. He paused. A friend wouldn’t call his friend a faggot. A friend wouldn’t push his friend to the breaking point to try and prove something he didn’t need to prove. He may be Zak’s friend, but Noah certainly wasn’t a friend back. The heavy footsteps drew closer, Zak taking a seat next to Noah.  


“I don’t think the grain in the floor will change no matter how hard to stare at it.” He was expecting a “princess” or a “pipsqueak” to end that statement. Instead, silence. A very awkward silence. The small demon sighed, drumming his fingers on the countertop, trying to figure out where to start. “Do you need more time?”  


“No…” he drew in a breath, “I don’t know…how else to say it…other than…I’m sorry.”  


“I guess that’s a good start.” Zak chuckled, tracing the dark lines in the white marble with his finger, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen…anyone, that angry before. And I’ve seen some people get really really mad.”  


“I don’t know what came over me…I just started letting out all…this” Noah gestured to himself, “and it was…I couldn’t stop.” He toyed with his glass, still avoiding Zak’s gaze.  


“That’s what happens when you keep all that stuff in. It just takes over you.”  


“Still doesn’t excuse me calling you a…” Noah’s voice trailed off, “I shouldn’t have pushed you like that…I could see how much it hurt…” Zak didn’t reply, merely twiddling his fingers, letting the small devil speak. Noah sat silent for a moment, “I’m assuming…this isn’t the first time you’ve dealt with this?”  


“You’re deflecting again.” Zak warned, “This is how it fell apart earlier too.”  


“I’ve trusted you with so much, why can’t you just tell me what’s wrong? You clearly have experience, I’m not looking for the whole story, just some context.”  


“Ever stop to consider that maybe I don’t trust you?” Noah swallowed, shrinking back, “I want to help you Noah, really, I do, but all this,” Zak pointed to Noah in a circular motion, “This needs to stop. You need to think of people other than yourself.”  


The tears came back, a sudden resurgence of shame. Noah leaned over the counter, covering his face in his sleeves, shoulders heaving as he cried. “What if…I fail? What if after all this…nothing changes?”  


“It’ll be the hardest thing you’ll ever do in your life,” Zak placed a hand on Noah’s shoulder, “But it starts with wanting to change. You have to keep telling yourself that you’re going to get better, ditch the ‘what ifs’ and focus on the when. Understand?”  


Noah nodded, finally turning to look at Zak. He bowed his head, taking in a deep breath before staring into his eyes, “I do. I don’t think I’ll be able to apologize enough for the shitty way I spoke to you earlier, and I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I want this. I want help,” he placed his hand over Zak’s, “I need, help.”  


“Then that’s that.” Zak pulled his hand away, rising from his seat, barely glancing over at Noah as he headed back toward the stairs. “The Boss and I will sit with you in the morning and make the call. In the meantime, try and relax.”  


“Zak wait!” He turned back to Noah, “I…I’m really glad it..it was you.” Noah stood up, following after the larger devil, “And...” he hugged himself again, “As dumb as it sounds...I wouldn't be opposed to...spending more time with you.” He returned to Zak's face, blushing fiercely, hopeful smile plastered on his lips.  


The large demon placed a hand on Noah's cheek, he was trembling, “Maybe...when you're better.” he offered the heir a weak smile, breathing becoming a little more heavy.  


“…you’re allowed to say no, I won’t be offended.”  


Zak withdrew his hand, staring at it like some foreign object that suddenly appeared on the end of his arm, “I…don’t want to say no…’cause I’d be lying.” He clenched his fist, still shaking, “There’s just…stuff I gotta work out first…”  


Noah rubbed Zak’s arm reassuringly, face softening, “Maybe when I come back, we’ll both be different people? And maybe we can meet each other for the first time again?”  


For the first time in the last two days, Noah saw it, happiness. Those intense eyes he’d been looking at suddenly glassy with joy, his whole demeanor changing right in front of him. The heir melted under his gaze, unable to pull himself away. “I’d like that.” 

Zak took the first couple steps back down to his dorm, “I’ll see you in the morning pipsqueak.”  


“What happened to princess?” Noah giggled, “I was just starting to get used to it. Pipsqueak is so much worse.”  


“Exactly. If you get used to my insults they’ll become pet names,” Zak smirked, “Can’t have that now can we?”  


“No, I suppose not.” Noah snickered, “Good night Zak.”  


He watched as the larger devil disappeared into the darkness of the lower floor, his heart racing. He knew that come morning there would be a new wave of stress, plus the potential to want to resist treatment, but the small demon felt ready. His phone buzzed against the marble again, then again, then a third time. Noah walked back over to investigate.  


_Apparently the guys followed me up and were listening to our conversation. They’re wishing you the best._  


The small hand holding the phone started to tremble, Noah’s heart racing. He read the other messages,  


_Buzz also wanted me to tell you he’s available if you want to date again._  


_I smacked him for you_  


He cackled, tears of joy falling from his eyes as he moved to the couch in the living room. His claws clicked against the glass as he typed out a response,  


_Tell him I said his hand would miss him if he got with someone else._  


There was a boisterous laughing fit from underneath the floorboards, a chorus of different voices tormenting the imp in unison. Noah giggled along, his fingers tapping the screen again,  


_You guys should head back downstairs before Papa wakes up. I’ll see you in the morning Zackie_  


_Good night Noah._


	4. To Catch Feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uh-oh, Zak's starting to catch those feelings

Post-summer rains were always an oddity for Dudael. Rain in itself was considered a rare occurrence for the desert city, but every year, almost like clockwork, fall was signaled by several days of downpour. It seemed to cool the whole atmosphere of the city, bringing with it a mild chill that more often than not soothed tensions as well. However, it also made loading up a car with three months worth of luggage a challenge, one that Zak was currently tasked with doing. He had agreed to accompany Noah for the two hour ride out of the city to a rehabilitation facility the next town over. Both to make sure the heir actually went there, and also so his new friend wouldn’t be alone. As he shut the trunk door closed, he caught sight of Noah in the front step, talking to his father, their words barely audible over the sound of the rain. He was sure it was just a myriad of goodbyes and “I love you’s,” probably something about change or whatever, but the large devil was glad to see them talking normally. Readjusting his raincoat, he scurried back over to the pair, hoping for a moment out of the weather before they left. 

“I’m sure three months will fly by.” Dernazas was holding both of Noah’s hands, a few tears dotting his eyes, “I’m just a phone call away if you need me, okay?” 

The small demon nodded, shifting on his feet, “I know Papa. I just hope no one there will recognize me.” 

“Well,” Zak interjected, grabbing a small black umbrella that rested beside the front door, “We did pick a place that far out for a reason. No use sending you somewhere around here, too much tension.” 

“Plus,” Dernazas smoothed out a few stray wrinkles off of Noah’s coat, “I think being far away from temptation will help you heal.” 

The old demon pulled his child in for a hug, whispering something into Noah’s ear Zak couldn’t make out. But he watched as the small demon started to tremble, gripping his father tighter. Zak popped the umbrella open, resting it on his shoulder as he lightly touched Noah’s back. 

“We should get going. They’re expecting you there soon.” 

With one last hug and a wave goodbye, Zak led the heir back towards the car, opening the door to let him him first, climbing in after him. He set the umbrella down on the floor beside him, pulling his soaked jacket off and placing it down as well. Noah was surprisingly silent, leaving his own coat on, staring out the window. Zak coughed, trying to get the small devil’s attention, but to no avail. He sighed, leaning back in his seat. 

“It’s gonna be a long ride,” eyes still fixated on the glass, “you might wanna take that coat off.” A heavy breath, wavering slightly. Zak leaned over his knees, chewing his lip, “Look, I know you’re scared, but…” his words died as Noah’s eyes rested on him, glassy and tired, “Did you sleep last night?” He shook his head, 

“When was the last time you slept?” No reply, eyes darting back to the window as the car began to pull away, “Noah…talk to me.” 

“Two days ago…” his voice was hushed, a bare whisper above the gentle pound of the rain. “Every time I closed my eyes…I kept hearing…voices….seeing things too.” He looked at Zak again, “Am I…am I going crazy?” 

Zak looked Noah over, scrutinizing the little differences in how the small demon was carrying themselves. Aside from his ragged face and hair from lack of sleep, he also had more of his body covered up than normal. He understood keeping a heavy coat on in the rain, but in the warmth of the car? That was cause for concern. His foot bounced quickly, with no discernible rhythm to it, almost erratic in nature. “No…no you’re not going crazy.” His eyes caught Noah picking at his hands, little bumps dotting the smooth surface, “You sure you wanna keep your jacket on? It’s kinda hot in here.” He watched was Noah folding in slightly, picking intensifying, “You’ve been picking at yourself.” A squeak, tears forming, “is it bad?” 

“It feels like I have…bugs…underneath my skin, all over me.” Noah slid his sleeve up, his left arm completely covered in nicks of varying depths, “It just won’t stop. I just can’t sit still anymore…” 

Zak stared at the wounds, “When was the last time you-“ 

“Four days ago.” Panic covered Noah’s face, “I promise I’ve been good I haven’t done anything!” The words rocketed off his tongue. 

“Relax, I believe you.” Zak spoke low, “Your body just got used to having something in your system. Now that you don’t have anything, it’s going crazy. It’s normal.” 

The tears started to spill over down Noah’s cheeks, “I just want it to stop, anything to just…make it stop…” he buried his face in his hands, still shaking wildly. 

Zak swallowed, the muffled cries coming from his friend causing his heart to ache. He reached across the small gap between them, placing a hand on Noah’s knee, “That’s what we’re doing. These people are professionals, they’ll know how to help you.” He rubbed his thumb back and forth, the rough denim of Noah’s jeans catching on the little indents of his skin, “Do you have anything on you to help pass the time? Friends to talk to, stupid little games on your phone?” 

Noah shook his head, face still covered by his hands, “I…I haven’t heard from my friends in days…no one’s even tried to talk to me since…” he let out another squeak, “I’m starting to think that maybe…I don’t have friends anymore…” 

“Well…” Zak looked at the floor, “I know it’s not much, but, you have me? I’d hope after all this shit we’ve been through, we’re friends?” 

The small demon laughed, lifting his face from his hands for a moment, wiping away a few stray tears, “Yeah…yeah I guess I do have one friend. He’s kind of an asshole though.” 

“Yeah a total jerk.” Zak took his hand away, leaning back in his seat. He felt a soft pair of hopeful eyes look him over, “What’s that look for?” 

“Well, it’s just that…” Noah carried a knowing smirk, color starting to slowly return to his face, “We have such a long ride ahead of us, I was hoping we could talk.” 

“If you’re trying to get me to spill my life story, you’ve got another thing coming.” A soft chuckle rumbled in Zak’s chest, “Besides, you’re the chatterbox over there, would you feel better if I quizzed you on your life?” 

“Okay, okay, that’s fair.” Noah pulled his legs up on the seat with him, curling up on the leather cushion, “Where do you want me to start?” 

“If you’re comfortable with it,” Zak leaned in closer, “I’d love to hear about your mom. From what Boss has told me, she was quite beautiful.” 

“She was…” 

“What did she look like?” Zak could see Noah start to relax in his seat little bits at a time, slowly but surely reclining into the corner. 

“She had hair like mine but three times as long, and she always kept it in a loose braid. I think the only time I saw her with it down was for Papa’s social events, and even then it was so well groomed you couldn’t tell how thick it was. And she had this soft, gentle smile that, no matter how upset or angry I was…she always calmed me down…made me feel safe…” he started to nod off, “Papa always said I got almost all of my looks from her. Right down to the,” He waggled his hooves, giggling as he did so. He sighed wistfully, settling against the window sill,“….I miss her.” 

“I’m sure you do.” Noah had closed his eyes, “You wanna try and sleep?” 

The heir simply nodded, curling up further into a little ball. Zak picked his coat up off the floor, shaking any excess rain from it before gently placing it over Noah’s form. The sheer size of it able to cover his whole body like a blanket. He laughed softly, watching the small demon drift off to sleep. Lighting himself a cigarette, he leaned back in his seat, pulling his phone from his pocket. Instinctively, he unlocked it without checking the screen, clicking open his music. As he reached for his headphones, his eyes caught the little notification icon above his texts. He popped the ear pieces in, frowning down at the screen. With a heavy sigh, he opened it. His heart nearly stopped, hands starting to shake, a number he thought he'd blocked appearing at the top, a wall of text below. His eyes scanned the paragraph, breathing quickening, his grip on the device tightening enough to threaten the glass to crack. The last few words almost sent him over the edge, but his thumb moved before he could register his actions, calling the number. He brought the phone to his face, letting his ear buds funnel the voice of the other end into his head. The line picked up, silence, only a gentle breathing sound. Zak let out a shaky breath before steadying himself, 

“What do you want Issac?” 

“I saw you went out a few days ago,” the voice on the other end saccharine sweet, dripping with venom, “That seems so unlike you Zakie. Why the sudden change?” 

“I said what do you want?” Zak struggled to keep his voice flat, “I'm in the middle of something.” 

“Now Zakie, no need to be rude. After all,” the large demon's shaking intensified, “You called me. I only wanted to talk.” 

“You know very well I have no intention of talking to you.” Zak hovered over the end button. 

“Fine.” Issac huffed through the receiver, “If you're trying to make me jealous, it's working. I just wanna know what he's like, the Prince.” Zak started bouncing his leg, “I heard he's one of the best fucks in the city, not that you would care about any of that.” 

“I'm hanging up now.” 

“Just remember Zakie, I was there first.” 

He slammed the pad of his thumb down on the screen, throwing his phone clear across the car, narrowly missing Noah's head. The shaking became uncontrollable, his hands gripping the base of his horns, rocking back and forth in the seat trying to settle himself. A soft hand touched his knee and he jumped out of his skin. Noah was staring at him. The sound that left his lips was incredibly feminine, a squeak that rivaled his friend's. He could barely see the small demon through his glazed over eyes, tears and panic clouding his vision. He kept his digits firmly planted on his skull, tugging at the grayish brown skin, desperate to get Issac's voice and words out of his head. Noah's mouth kept moving but no sound reached his ears, the one-sided conversation playing on repeat in his mind. Delicate hands gripped at his cheeks, wiping his eyes with the thumbs, clearing his vision. 

“Zak!” Noah was shouting, “Zak, who was that? What happened?” 

He reached up and touched the small hands on his face, tears flowing steadily down his face. His mouth opened to speak but his throat was dry, letting out another squeak. Noah wiped away more tears, his jacket still draped over his lithe figure. 

“You threw your phone so hard I'm surprised you didn't break the window.” Noah laughed lightly, “Bonked me on the shoulder.” Zak stayed silent, still trying to regain control of his body. “Hey...breathe.” Noah guided Zak for a breath in, holding it for a few seconds before releasing slowly, “Now, you don't have to say anything-” 

“It was...” that's all he could say before his words died off again. He took in another controlled breath, releasing as he finished, “It was...someone I would've rather not spoken too.” 

“I gathered that from the three-hundred dollar projectile.” Noah offered another light chuckle. An awkward silence hung between them, so thick it was suffocating. “You...you wanna talk about it?” 

“Not particularly.” Zak finally got his form to stop shaking, realizing his smoke had completely burned out before he could enjoy it. He scoffed, ashing it in the tray set into the car interior .”You should try and go back to sleep. I’m sorry I woke you.” 

Noah shook his head, shifting into the seat beside Zak, “I’m not gonna get a whole lot so might as well just try again tonight.” He yawned, “Besides, I’m worried about you. You seemed to go right to eleven with the panic, just wanna make sure you’re okay.” 

“I’ll be fine…” Zak was still trembling slightly, now mostly from the new closeness they shared. He absentmindedly scooted away from Noah, “like I said the other night, I’ve got my own shit to work out.” 

Noah sighed, moving closer to the side of the car to give his friend some space, “Who’s Issac? I’ve head you say his name a couple times now.” 

“He’s the president of Nunya.” 

Noah stared at him, confused, “What’s Nunya?” 

“Nunya business.” Zak chuckled, “I’ve never actually gotten that to work before.” Noah had a look of death in his eyes, rolling them so hard he shocked they didn’t pop out of the small demon’s skull. He sighed, “He’s…what I need to work out.” 

“An ex of some kind then?” 

“You could say that. You call it an ex, I call it the bane of my existence.” Zak pulled a fresh smoke from his pocket, determined to get something in his system to help steady his rapidly firing nerves. 

“You didn’t block his number?” 

“I seem to recall me saying I don’t wanna talk about this, pipsqueak.” He shot the small devil a warning glance. 

“You aren’t, I just happen to be guessing this stuff correctly.” Zak was the one rolling his eyes now, taking a drag off his cigarette, “So…if he’s your ex…then I was right? About you bein’ gay?” 

Another look of death, this time accompanied by a hot flush, “Why the fuck does that matter?” 

Noah raised his hands in defense, “Hey, chill, I didn’t mean anything by it. Just making sure I’m reading you right.” He settled into the corner of the seat, pulling his legs up to his chest, “I wouldn’t have much room to judge since I am too ya know.” 

“I figured that out.” Zak let out a snicker, “I practically saw you ride someone the other night, figured dudes were your thing.” He looked over at Noah, his face an adorable shade of ruby, “I’d been meaning to ask you actually, you…you are a boy, right?” The small devil perked up a little, “Like I know you haven’t corrected me in saying he and all that but…you’ve got that whole…” he raked his brain for an appropriate synonym for slutty that wouldn’t offend the heir, “Androgyny, goin’ on.” 

Noah bore a devilish smirk, “You’re asking ‘cause you like me, don’t you Zak?” 

“I’m askin’ to be polite, jackass.” His face was burning, he brought his smoke back to his lips and kept it there, trying to hide his expression. 

“Sure.” Noah elongated every letter, stretching out his body again, “But to answer your question, no. No I’m not.” Zak was puzzled, all of his features scrunching up trying to wrap his head around that answer, “But that doesn’t make me a girl either. I’m like, a good mix of both, and I feel like there’s enough of both that it feels more fitting to say I’m Noah than either a boy or a girl.” 

“Then why do you still let people call you He and shit?” 

Noah shrugged, “It’s just what I’m used to I suppose. I’ve been hearing it my whole life and it’s not technically wrong so I just accept it.” 

“Well…” Zak smiled lightly at Noah, “Which do you prefer? I’d rather call you what makes you more comfortable.” 

The small devil smiled back and Zak’s heart stopped again. When did this little thing get so damn cute? “You’re sweet Zak, but you’re fine. If I felt uncomfortable I would’ve said something. As long as you don’t call me boy or anything like that I’ll be happy.” 

“That explains Boss calling you ‘child’ all the time. I figured it was just ‘cause you were such a brat.” He flinched and snickered as Noah shoved his arm playfully, “But I’ll keep that in mind.” 

Noah toyed with the huge jacket draped over his shoulders, fidgeting in his seat, “I’m starving, are you hungry? How far out are we?” 

Zak shook his head, scoffing, “We’ve only been on the road for forty-five minutes pipsqueak, and we had breakfast before we left, how are you already so hungry?” 

“One thing you should learn quick about me Zakie,” hearing that all-to-familiar nickname pierced his heart, causing Zak to flinch, “I’m always down to eat, always.” Noah slid open the partition behind them, leaning over the seat to speak to the driver. 

Zak caught himself eyeing Noah’s butt as the small devil was bent over the seat, the blush returning in full force. Even underneath the coats and jackets, his jeans hugged his curves in the best way, his pert little cheeks popping off his body, tail swaying idly as he arranged a stop. Zak swallowed hard. He felt the blood rush from his cheeks, and he turned his body away to keep a blossoming erection hidden from view. ‘Fuck, stop staring at him you creep! He’s not even that cute!’ He was yelling at himself in his mind, ‘Just because he wears pants so tight it’s like he’s wearing nothing doesn’t mean you can ogle him like that!’ Noah flopped back into the seat, crossing one of his legs over the other and sliding the partition closed again. 

“Alright, were gonna take the next stop and get somethin’ to eat.” He felt Noah’s eyes on him, his face on fire, “You alright over there tough guy?” He nodded, channeling his energy into bouncing his knee, “You sure about that? ‘Cause your face is tellin’ me otherwise.” 

“I’m good.” Zak’s voice squeaked subtly again, and he cursed himself. He cleared his throat, coughing from the smoke, “Just, replayed the phone call again.” He knew Noah could see through the fib. He wasn’t shaking or anything, so there wasn’t really any panic that was readable, but he hoped his friend would take the hint and stop questioning it. He didn’t. 

“Right.” There was that long drawn out voice again. The little shit was going to make things difficult, “You’re an awful liar, you know that?” He was moving closer. Zak’s chest started to pound, so loud it echoed in his ears, “You can tell me you like me, I won’t mind.” A hand reached out for the larger devil’s leg. True panic set in as Zak ripped himself from the seat. 

“NO!” He landed on the floor of the car, scrambling away from his friend, clutching his chest. His tongue started firing off apologies, screwing his eyes shut, “I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m trying to get it to go away I know I’m disgusting I just can’t control it and and…” 

“Woah woah, sugar, slow down!” It was Noah’s turn to ease the hyperventilating, lowering his voice, “I-I was just teasin’ ya, it’s okay.” 

“Why…why is it so hard around you…?” Zak asked himself more than he asked Noah, looking down at his hands through the panic, “Why can’t I control this anymore…?” 

“Control what?” The small devil slid down onto the floor, making himself level with Zak. 

“I can’t…hide it like normal. The shaking, the erratic heart beat, the panic attacks…” he clenched his fists, “You just…act just like him…it’s so uncanny.” 

“Who? Your ex?” Zak nodded, “Why is that bad? What…what did he do to you?” He shook his head, pulling himself back up onto the seat. Noah reached out to him again, slower this time, “You can’t say something like that and not elaborate. I know it stings but I think it’s my turn to help you.” 

“He was a monster…” Zak’s eyes welled up again, memories resurfacing, “He was abusive and manipulative and….and I let it all happen…” 

“Zakie…” 

“Please, anything, anything,” He gripped his skull again, “Call me anything else but please don’t call me that.” The small devil shrunk back. “I can’t handle it again…I can’t do this again.” 

“Sugar,” Noah crawled up on the seat, just far enough away to give Zak some room, “No one said you had to. You’ve clearly got some baggage, it would be stupid of me to force you into something you don’t want.” He placed his hand on the leather between them, “Im sorry I’ve been giving you so much grief. I had no idea the pain you’re dealing with, and I know I won’t ever fully understand how deep it goes.” Zak turned to look at his friend, panic subsiding, “But you’ve done so much for me already, I want to try and return the favor.” 

Zak said nothing, simply wiping his face with one hand. He had a million things he wanted to say, to confess, but knew now wasn’t the time. Not when they were on their way to drop Noah off for rehab, not when the scars from Issac were still so fresh. He sighed, chewing his lip. “Thank you.” He glanced back over at his friend, “I know I don’t express positivity very well but, I am…better. And I appreciate you being so willing to help.” 

“I know there isn’t much I can do, but I know you need someone to talk to. And, maybe you should talk to Papa, see if he can arrange for you to start meeting with a professional yourself.” Noah let out a short laugh, “If there’s one thing I know about my father, it’s that he does actually care for his employees, even those that do his dirty work.” 

Zak chuckled, “Poor old man has two mentally fucked up demons to deal with now.” He turned back to Noah, “But maybe you’re right. Let’s change my qualifier from the other day.” The small devil cocked his head to the side, “Lets try this…when both of us are better.” 

“Seems only fair.” Noah shifted in his seat, “Although...three months will get pretty lonely all by myself. We can still text each other, right?” 

“I think I would miss you if we didn't.” Zak smirked, “Who else would I torment for three months?” Noah shoved Zak again, trying to pout past his smile. 

The car pulled slowly to a stop. Noah perked up, scooting toward the door, “Finally!” 

Zak broke into a heavy fit of laughter, “It amazes me how quickly your mood changes when food gets involved.” 

The small demon stuck his forked tongue out in response, spinning in his seat to exit their ride. Zak simply shook his head, laughing under his breath, “I really hope this is what you're always like.” he was speaking to an empty car, shuffling toward the door to follow his friend, “I could use more sunshine in my life.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoying the work so far? You should check out [my tumblr](https://crashcoursemaster.tumblr.com) for story updates, art of my characters, and memes!


	5. Zak's Therapy Visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zak took Noah's advice and got himself some help

_I’m very glad you’ve agreed to meet with me today Zakamin. _  
Yeah well, figured maybe instead of suffering in silence I should actually try and get better.  
_Well that is the first step toward healing, admitting you need help. Why don’t you tell me a little bit about yourself?_  
I’m 259, not much of a talker, born and raised in this hell hole. What else do you need to know?  
_What about your family? What were they like?_  
Pretty normal. My old man worked for the Don since he was a teen, raised me and my brother to join him when we got old enough. Three sisters, loving mom, nothing out of the ordinary.  
_I see. Would you say you had a good relationship with your father and brother?_  
Yeah. My brother can be a massive dick but he’s got a good heart and always looked out for us. Pops did too.  
_It’s nice to hear that there’s still some young gang members who care about their families._  
It’s definitely a rare thing. I do consider myself lucky to have them.  
_And what about your work? I assume it’s brought it’s own hardships? I was informed ahead of time that your particular line of work must not be discussed, but I would like to hear your thoughts on how it affects you._  
It’s…I’m not proud of it, good place to start. It’s work, I’m good at it, I try not to think about it any more than that.  
_Has it ever weighed on you?_  
What do you mean?  
_Let me rephrase, has carrying out an order ever affected your mood or your mental state?_  
Ah, yeah, a couple times. Usually when I have to use more force than I think is necessary and someone I didn’t intend to hurt gets hurt.  
_I see. Now then, I was told you’ve been suffering from panic attacks._  
…  
_It’s nothing to be ashamed of. Trauma often brings with it lingering side effects. Are these linked to your work in anyway?_  
…no. No I don’t freak out about work anymore. Never really did. Actually, being on the job helps get me in a more calm mindset. I think something about keeping a straight face helps suppress the panic.  
_Is it something from your childhood? A near death experience? Bullies?_  
No, normal childhood. I think the other kids tended to keep their distance since I’ve always been so…bulky.   
_I can tell this makes you uncomfortable, and I understand why, please remember that this is a safe environment. I won’t judge you or your experiences._  
I don’t know if I like that phrasing.  
_Simply a reminder. Are you ready to talk about your panic attacks?_  
Yeah…guess it’s time to rip the Band-Aid off. I…I just recently got out of an abusive relationship.   
_I’m very sorry to hear that Zakamin. If it’s alright, would you mind elaborating?_  
I can’t promise I’ll get through this without some resistance.  
_That’s okay. I want this to be your time, so don’t feel like you need to rush. Take as long as you need._  
I guess I should start with him then…he and I started off great. He was loving and affectionate, we were inseparable. Maybe it was my own naivety that blinded me…but I didn’t see any signs.  
_Red flags are often hard to spot through rose-tinted glasses. When did the abuse start?_  
After we moved in together. He became a different person, like once he knew he had me, he let his true colors show.  
_How long were you two together before that?_  
A year, I think? Then another year of us living together before I got out.  
_How did he make you feel before you moved in?_  
He made me feel like the most amazing person. He talked me up to everyone, he always thanked me for even the smallest little signs of affection. I genuinely could feel his love for me.  
_What about after?_  
….  
_It seems to me like he has had quite an effect on you._  
He made me feel like scum. No better than the gum on his shoe…the look of disgust he would give me for even asking for affection I think hurt more than anything else he did.  
_What else did he do? _  
There…there was a lot…but he would usually just yell at me, bark orders at me. I think he expected me to just keep his house clean and pay all his expenses. Anything said to me was a command more than a request. He brought me to tears a couple of times, and when that happened I could see glimpses of the person I once knew in him.   
_Did he ever hit you? Force himself on you?_  
Not at first…and only twice that I can vividly remember.   
_I imagine those are very painful for you. _  
I still feel his hands on me every once in a while…and now I’m at the point where I’m ready to move on but my body just…shuts down.  
_And the panic attacks stem from that I presume?_  
Yeah…I have this…friend, I’ve made recently. And he’s very touchy, gentle taps on the arm, likes to hug, but every time he’s close to me I start shaking. Like I can’t go near him without my brain telling me it’s a trap, that he’s gonna hit me or that he’s trying to get through my walls.  
_This friend, is it a potential partner you see yourself having? You mentioned you’re ready to move on, so I’m curious what your thoughts are._  
I mean…maybe? He’s sweet and funny and…so much like…the other him. And I don’t know…part of me thinks he’s just a brat that wouldn’t be interested in a serious relationship….another is actually really wants to pursue it. That’s the part I wanna listen to.  
_Do you think you’re ready for another relationship? How long as it been since you left your abuser?_  
Six months now. I keep telling myself that I need to find someone else, then maybe my heart will stop hurting. But at the same time I have these violent reactions to the lightest touch…maybe I’m just too broken.  
_I don’t think anyone is truly broken in that regard. You have deep wounds that need to heal, and those will only really start to close with time, even then will never really go away._  
That’s not very reassuring.  
_You mentioned briefly that your abuser got physical. Did you ever go to the police? Sometimes seeing those who hurt you suffer the consequences of their actions help as well._  
Why bother? I’m basically part of the police in this town, it wouldn’t do any good. Plus with me being so much bigger they’d probably think I was the aggressor.  
_I see your point. Have you been in contact with your abuser at all?_  
…he called me two months ago while I was taking my friend to rehab. Seemed to just want to get under my skin.  
_What did he say?_  
He told me he was jealous. I guess he assumed I had started dating my friend and wanted to try and rile me up in the hopes of taking away any good in my life. I didn’t really even say anything back to him, but it did set off another panic attack.  
_How often do you suffer attacks? Once a day, a week?_  
Best guess is probably…two or three times a week? Depends on who I’m with and what’s being talked about.  
_I know you mentioned that being touched in a familiar way triggers attacks, are there any other triggers you know about?_  
Sometimes even hearing his name causes me to start shaking. None of my friends know about what happened either so they keep trying to push, it only makes it worse.  
_Is there a reason you haven’t told your friends? I would think they would be able to help you in healing._  
I guess…not a good reason? I’m just so scared of them mocking me for getting my ass kicked by someone smaller than me…someone I loved.  
_Are they the type to do something like that?_  
…no I guess not. Should I tell them?  
_That’s up to you. If you think it would help you then I think yes._  
Okay…  
_Was there anything else you needed to get off your chest Zakamin? We still have some time._  
No I think I’ve poked the wounds enough for today.  
_Very well. I would like for you to start taking these *hands Zak a prescription* they should help balance out your mood swings and lessen the effects of your panic attacks._  
Thank you.  
_We can continue to discuss this next week if you wish to continue?_  
Yeah…yeah, this helped.


	6. The Two Month Chip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noah checks in with his program director to see how he's progressing in his recovery

_Alright Nollahar, are you ready for your two month check-in?_  
Yep!  
_Wonderful. Now then, we've been hearing nothing but good things from your sponsors and your doctor, but how have you been feeling?_  
It's been night and day. I don't have the cravings that I used to get, I feel happier, I'm still trying to control my outbursts though.  
_That's okay, we can work on that next month. Have you been attending your group sessions?_  
Not...regularly.   
_Any reason why? They're designed to help you._  
I know...I guess I'm still...hesitant, to admit to everything.  
_Understandable, but everyone here has had their own experiences, some very similar to yours. You don't think you would find comfort in hearing their stories?_  
It's not that...at least, I don't think it is anyway. I think it's a pride thing.  
_I'm assuming your own?_  
Yeah.   
_Has anyone here given you the impression that you'll be mocked or outcast by sharing your experience?_  
Well, no...  
_Would you feel more comfortable sharing in a private setting? I know groups can be overwhelming._  
I would rather...not share at all. I would rather just take my meds and talk about my past, or really anything other than my addiction.  
_What makes you feel that way?_  
It's embarrassing...that I ever felt like I needed anything other than people. Talking about it just makes me feel so...awful. I'd rather just sweep the whole thing under the rug and forget about it.  
_That does always seem easy, doesn't it? But you know that isn't healthy, keeping it all in._  
Why not? It's not like I killed someone or that I'm suicidal or anything. Seems like a harmless thing I can just keep to myself.  
_That may be the case, but keeping your pain to yourself will only allow it to fester. Your outbursts of anger are proof of that._  
…  
_Think you can try? I'm sure it's painful, but I won't judge you._  
...do I have to?  
_I would like you to try, yes._  
I don't even know where to start...  
_How about what first drew you to self-medicating?_  
Well...I had been using casually for a few months before I got hooked, and that happened shortly after I lost my mom.  
_I see. Were you and your mother close?_  
She...she was my best friend. I told her everything and she was always so supportive of me...  
_How did she die?_  
...some of my father's enemies got her. By the time we found her it...it was too late...  
_Did you...see her?_  
...Can we change the subject please?  
_Yes, of course. Perhaps that is a little too far for today._  
…  
_I know this is uncomfortable, but we can't help you if you don't let us know what's hurting._  
All of this hurts. Losing my mom hurt, losing my friends hurt, why do you think I'm here?  
_Putting on a face just to get through the program won't really help you Nollahar. We genuinely want to see you improve, I'm sure there are folks at home that want to see that too._  
I know...I am trying...  
_Recovery is difficult, but we're here to help you if you're ready to receive the help._  
I am...I'm sorry  
_It's quite alright. Let's focus on what you just told me, about losing your friends, what did you mean by that?_  
I was stupid...and I ended up O-Ding before I was brought here.  
_That's what I was told. Your friend and your father seemed very concerned about you, am I wrong in assuming that?_  
No, Zak's my friend...probably the only one I have left...no one else reached out after I almost died.  
_I'm very sorry to hear that. Perhaps then, they aren't the people you should be associating with._  
They were the same ones who encouraged my use so...maybe you're right...  
_How frequently did you use? If these people were your friends I would imagine it was frequent._  
Two or three times a day...Sometimes more, they always dragged me out even when I didn't really want to.  
_I see. You certainly have been through a lot recently. Are you feeling better now that you've started opening up?_  
A little...are there...are there really other people here like me?  
_Absolutely. In fact, there's a young woman in your group with a very similar story._  
Really?  
_Yes. I know everyone in your group is eager to have you join them. Do you think you could try and go?_  
I suppose so...  
_If you feel the need to talk or if you need one-on-one help, please don't be afraid to say so. We're here to help you._  
Okay...thank you.


	7. Something To Come Home To

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After three long months Noah's home, and there's something important waiting for him when he arrives

_You excited to be home, pipsqueak?_

_Yeah!_ Noah laid completely reclined against the wall of the car, feet up on the bench seat, _I can’t wait to see you and Papa again! I missed you guys._

_Well, I’m on a job right now so you probably won’t see me until tomorrow._

Noah pouted, shifting his position so he was slightly more upright, _No fair!_

_We’ve been talking every day for the past 3 months, I think you can handle one more day._

_Fine._ He added a frowny face emoticon, _I’ll let you do your job then._

Noah clicked his phone closed, setting it aside on the seat beneath him. He didn’t expect Zak to reply, and even if he did Noah wasn’t planning on responding. He’d learned over the course of their text conversations that Zak hated double texts, so he tended not to reply back at the natural end of a discussion. The lithe demon stretched out his arms, his shoulders popping from the readjustment, excitement and nervousness causing him to be more fidgety than normal. After three long months of therapy and medication, he felt like a new person. He still had some depressive episodes and his temper still needed some help, but on the whole Noah felt like he was ready to return to his life. After all he missed his father immensely, having not been away from him for so long before. They had talked on the phone once a week but it was more of them checking in on each other, and Dernazas usually ended up guiding the conversation back to work after a while. The one thing Noah wasn’t looking forward to returning to: his job. At least now he hoped it would be a little easier to get work done on his own now that his mind wasn’t clouded. He tried to stay somewhat on top of the happenings in Dudael while he was gone too, so he shouldn’t get too much grief from the council about anything. Most of them seemed to have been under the impression that Noah was just taking a long vacation more than doing any sort of recovery. For as much grief they gave him about his use, he was shocked they weren’t as supportive of Noah seeking help. But he chalked that up to them just being old fashioned. He lifted his head up to peer out of the opposite window, watching as the scenery outside flew past matching the speed of the vehicle. Lots of open space and a clear view of the mountains, so still a good bit away from the city, probably another forty-five minutes or so. Noah sighed, picking his phone back up again. He figured since he was making the trip alone this time he might as well entertain himself. Wiggling back down in his seat, he pulled up the book he had started reading on his phone. Being away from all of his usual hobbies pretty much forced him to pick up new ones, and reading was one of the ones his therapist had suggested. He was hesitant at first. The energetic devil never found sitting still for hours enjoyable, but now finds it relaxing. He could let his mind wander and get lost in the text, and since he read so slowly, time seemed to vanish. He nestled his head into his shoulders, the soft fabric of his sweater encasing his neck and jaw in a warm comfort as he settled into a comfortable position. He held his phone on his chest, elbows resting on the seat, hooves pressed into the cushion keeping his legs bent. His tail hung lazily off of the side, flicking occasionally more out of instinct than boredom. He quickly found his place and resumed reading, a soft smile crossing his lips as his eyes scanned the words. One of the members in his group session had mentioned romance as a good genre for Noah to start off with. Most books that were written that way were easy reads, usually containing more dialogue and description than huge walls of text that seemed to talk about nothing. Plus, the young demon could fantasize about finding that one person he could spend his whole life with. It wasn’t something he had thought about often, satisfied with just sleeping around and fulfilling his sexual urges, but he’d be lying if he claimed to never think about it. Someone to hold him and cuddle him and whisper sweet nothings into his ear, someone to love him for who he was rather than his body. His thoughts started to wander as he continued reading, the strong silent love interest character slowly being replaced by someone else in Noah’s mind. His heart fluttered. He and Zak had grown closer over their conversations the last few months, the large demon seeming to have softened up a bit through playful talks and meaningful discussions. They had talked a lot about their families and their pasts, interests and hobbies. It was almost as if neither had remembered the awkward interactions they had the first day they met. Noah was certainly glad to keep it that way. If they never again talked about the club he’d die happy. Though he still remembered the tenderness in Zak’s mannerisms. The way he cradled the small demon as they walked, rubbing his back, wiping the hair from his face. A blush dusted Noah’s cheeks. He wondered how Zak would react to being told about Noah’s little crush. Probably not well, given how jumpy he was. They had talked briefly about it, but Zak was always quick to change the subject whenever his ex was brought up. Noah assumed it was rough, which probably meant that he wasn't looking for anything serious. He let out a heavy sigh, trying to refocus back to his reading. A notification popped down in front of his book, drawing him back to reality for a moment. It was Zak again, 

“Huh?” Noah sat up, resting his back against the car. He clicked the message open. 

_So...you bored out of your skull yet?_

He giggled, pulling his knees into his chest, _No, just reading again. Aren't you on the job tough guy?_

_Who are you, my boss?_

_Might as well be,_ his stomach started to churn, butterflies going crazy, _You sound like you're the bored one if you're texting me again._

There was a moment where the typing indicator seemed to idle endlessly. He must be trying to think of something snarky. 

_Kinda. I think I'm more just excited to see you._

_Awwww Minie!!!_ Noah snickered. He wouldn't normally make a pet name like that from the end of Zakamin, but since “Zakie” was off the table, he had to get creative. 

_I changed my mind. I'm making a beeline for my dorm and locking myself in._

The small demon was in hysterics, laughing so hard he could barely see the screen, clutching his abdomen. 

_I bet you're just laughin' your ass off aren't ya pipsqueak?_

_I can't help it Zak, you're just too much fun to tease._ Noah wiped some tears from his face, laughter dying down a bit. 

_You've been talking to me too much, I'm being a bad influence._

_I've been snarky long before I met you._ He rolled over so he was laying on his stomach, resting on his elbows. 

_I know. I just like feeling important._

The endless indicator popped up again while Noah was working on a reply. Another message arrived before he was done, 

_How far out are you?_

He erased what he had, instead answering the question, _Probably fifteen minutes or so. We stopped to get food on the way._

_I think I would start to question what alien replaced you if you didn't._

Noah giggled, tapping one claw against the glass, trying to think of a reply. His heart was racing, thinking back to his earlier thoughts of his crush. He didn't want the conversation to end yet, and he knew as soon as he got home his father would be hogging all the attention away. _Must be a pretty easy job if you're able to talk for this long._

_It's just a little intimidation task. Talon is just making things difficult, so I get to sit and watch the shit show._

_What happened?_ Noah knew very little about how Zak's group operated, and knew even less about what their jobs usually entailed. 

_He got into a dick measuring contest with the guy we went to see and now they're arguing. I know better than to get in the middle so I'm hanging back to make sure the stupid lizard doesn't get shot._

_Now I see why Papa tends to pair you guys off._ Not the conversation he was hoping for, but it was better than nothing, _Sounds like Talon and Buzz share one brain cell between them._

_You're not wrong. They're pretty fucking stupid, but they get jobs done so can't really complain._

He craned his neck to look out the window, spotting familiar buildings as they entered the city. Tucking his knees under his belly, he sat up in his seat properly. _I'll let you get back to work, we're pretty much home._

_Sounds good pipsqueak._ Zak tucked his phone back into his pocket once the message sent. The Boss would be keeping Noah occupied for the rest of the day anyway so no need to force the conversation anymore. He instead turned his attention back to Talon, currently shaking their target by the collar and shouting something about respect. With a heavy roll of his eyes, he shoved off the wall he was resting on and went to collect his partner. He gripped Talon by the fringe on his neck, yanking the scaly demon back. The target hit the floor with a thud, shaking uncontrollably as he looked up at the two from his seat on the ground. 

“That's enough Talon,” Zak huffed out, “We already got what we needed, no need to swing your dick around anymore.” he shot the figure on the floor a dangerous glare, “And if we have to come back, I won't be as nice next time, are we clear?” 

“Cr-cr-crystal...” 

“Good.” He turned on his heels, dragging Talon along with him, “Let's go.” 

The lizard waited until they left the room before wriggling out of Zak's grip, shoving the taller back, “I can walk, jackass! Christ, you ruin all the fun.” 

“It's work Talon, it's not supposed to be fun.” 

“You heard what he said to me! He was askin' for it!” Talon smoothed out his shirt, shaking his head to readjust his fringe, “Should'a' just killed him, then we wouldn't have to come back.” 

“If the Boss wanted him dead he would've said so.” Zak stared ahead blankly as they exited the building into an alleyway, “And if I recall, you're the one who started it when you insisted on leading.” 

“I don't see how else to collect than by roughin' them up a bit.” 

“You have some fucking tact you dolt.” Zak sighed, “Jumpin' them could get you killed. You ease into it first.” 

“Alright, alright I don't need a lecture.” Talon stuck his hands in his pockets as they walked. Silence hung between them for a bit. Zak was grumbling internally. If he were the one to take charge they'd be back already and he could see his friend for the first time in months. Instead, he got to sit back and watch a thirty minute job take two hours. At least he got to talk to Noah for a bit. “I don't know about you,” Talon interrupted his fuming, “But I'm fuckin' starvin'. We should get somethin' on our way back.” 

“We can eat at the house.” Zak stated flatly. 

“Oh yeah, the brat comes back today right?” Talon guessed, “Was wonderin' why you wanted to go back so bad.” 

“Don't call him that.” Zak glared at Talon. “He's not a brat.” 

“Sorry,” Talon smirked, “Didn't mean to insult your _boyfriend.”_

Zak stopped dead, grabbing the lizard by the arm, “You wanna get into it? 'Cause we can get into it. You've done nothin' but push my buttons today so puttin' you in your place would only make today better.” 

“Jesus dude, chill!” Talon tore his arm from Zak's grip, “What crawled up your ass today? I'm just messin' with ya.” 

“He's not my boyfriend.” Zak was keeping himself flat, nerves causing his emotions to flare. 

“Yeah, but we all know you like him. Might as well be by now.” Talon pulled open the door to their ride, climbing into the driver's seat, “You've been texting him every damn day.” 

“I'm allowed to have friends outside of you guys.” Zak took his place in the passenger's side. 

“Bro,” Talon shot Zak a look, “Friends don't fucking _giggle_ at their phone when they get a text. They don't send good night and good morning messages. You're crushin' _hard.”_

Zak blushed, “What do you know anyway?” 

“I know that you need to grow a pair and **ask him out.”** Talon turned the key in the ignition, engine roaring to life, “What's your hang up on it anyway?” 

“Ya know, you ain't my first pick for relationship advice.” Zak sighed, resting on the window sill of the car, “But I don't know. Maybe it's just me being dumb.” 

“I know you got messed up bad. You're allowed to be scared, but you should still go for it.” Talon chuckled, peeling out of the alleyway and onto the busy downtown street, “We haven't seen you this happy in months dude.” 

“I think that's the least shitty thing you've said all day.” 

“Yeah, well, don't get used to it.” Talon turned away, “For all the fucking around we do, we still care about ya, even Taz.” 

Zak sat silently for a moment, “Do you think...he'll be like...” 

“You tell me. You're the one who's talked to him the most.” 

He thought back to all the interactions he's had with Noah. The small demon certainly wore his intentions on his sleeve, never shying away from expressing himself. Though the violent tantrum he threw was some cause for concern. If he always resorted to kicking and screaming when angry, it was going to be a big problem. Then again, he was going through withdrawal and kept getting his wounds poked at, maybe he stays the sweet bubbly little devil he always is. He thought about how cute he looked the night after, when Zak was leaving to go change. The small thing was all wrapped up like a burrito, the most peaceful expression on his face through all the nastiness. Zak let out a wistful sigh, resting his head on his palm, elbow on the window ledge. Their talks the past few months certainly made Noah seem like a genuinely sweet demon, always curious, never afraid to crack a joke, respecting his boundaries when it came to topics of conversation. Zak was zoned out, completely lost in his thoughts until Talon started laughing maniacally, 

“See? Look at that dumb smile on your face!” he took one hand off the wheel to lightly punch Zak in the arm, “You're askin' him out tonight when we get back.” 

“What?!” Zak shot up in his seat, “No way dude!” 

“I'm locking you out of your room until you do. I ain't gonna sit on my ass and watch you pass this up.” 

Zak's heart started pounding. Even with the mood levelers in his system, he started to panic. Fortunately, this seemed more of a nervous panic than one from trauma. He hid his face in his hands, the blush crawling across his face to the tips of his ears. “I-I can't do it Talon. I wouldn't even know what to say! What if he doesn't like me back? I just became friends with him, I-I don't wanna ruin it!” 

“Zak, relax,” Talon put the free hand on Zak's trembling shoulder, “We'll help you. Don't think about it too hard, it's just a date.” he laughed again, “Besides, if you don't, Buzz is gonna keep goin' after him.” 

Zak chuckled through the shakes, “I fuckin' hate you guys.” 

The car pulled into the front drive, a small imp scurrying from the driver's door. He grasped the rear door handle with both hands, using all his strength to pull the door open, letting Noah out. The small demon offered the imp a nod in thanks before heading for the front door. Dernazas was standing on the step, wide smile on his face, eyes sparkling. He opened his arms wide, pulling Noah in for a tight hug. 

“There's my darling pumpkin.” he kissed Noah's cheek, pressing the small demon closer, “I missed you.” 

“I missed you too Papa.” He wrapped his arms around his father, resting on the wide shoulder, “It was so weird being so far away so long.” 

“I'm glad it wasn't just me. I'm sure you want to go relax for a while?” 

Noah simply nodded, pushing the door open and heading into the foyer, his father close behind. It was a relief to be back home, back to the familiarity of his father's expansive estate. The mahogany floors beneath him, the massive windows that let the soft autumn sunset in, blanketing the whole house in a soft yellow hue. Housekeepers were scattered about the open floor, continuing their daily tasks of keeping the furniture and decorations free of dust. They offered the heir a quiet welcome home as he crossed the floor to the main staircase that led to the loft upstairs. The first floor was mainly used for entertaining purposes, but had Dernazas' study tucked into the east corner and the entrance to the staff quarters on the west. Noah's eyes wandered over to the black door as he started ascending, wondering if his friend was there yet. He shook his head, focusing back on the stairs. Zak said they would see each other tomorrow, and that was okay. After all, it's not like the two were a couple and he could use it as an excuse to be clingy. He let out a sigh, waiting for his father at the top of the stairs. 

“I keep saying I'm going to put an elevator in this damn place,” Dernazas was panting, “I'm getting to old to be climbing up all these stairs.” 

“You're not that old Papa.” Noah giggled, “Though if it's that hard to get around we can always move your desk and stuff into your room.” 

“I have no intention on becoming a shut in Noah.” the stout devil patted his child on the shoulder, catching his breath, “I just need to go see about getting a supplement or something.” 

Noah flopped onto one of the couches in the living area, sprawling out across the plush surface, “As long as you know what you need I guess,” he rolled onto his stomach, resting his chin on the arm of the couch to look at his father, “Are we going anywhere else today? I really wanna just put pajamas on and call it a day.” 

“No, I was betting on you going out with friends though,” Dernazas joined Noah on an adjacent couch, settling on the edge, “You don't have any plans for tonight?” 

Noah shook his head, “I haven't heard from anyone in months. Basically once word got out I was gonna get clean they stopped talking to me.” 

“Oh, pumpkin.” the Don's face softened, “I'm so sorry, I had no idea.” 

“It's okay Papa. They weren't really friends anyway.” 

“So for three months I'm the only person you talked to?” 

Noah laughed, “I made friends there. Plus Zak and I have been talking every day.” 

“Really?” Dernazas rose from his seat, “Well, that's good at least. I'll let you get changed while I figure out something for dinner.” 

“Why is that shocking?” Noah rolled off the couch, “Does he not talk to anyone outside of here?” 

“Not recently. And before that the only person I'd known about was an old boyfriend of his.” 

“Oh...” Noah's eyes drifted to the floor. His thoughts started to run wild, thinking about all the good talks they've had. Not to mention his crush on Zak. If the large demon really didn't talk to anyone else then, maybe... 

“Noah?” the small demon snapped from his thoughts at his father's voice, “Did you hear me?” 

“N-no, sorry.” He shifted his feet, “What did you ask?” 

“I asked if you wanted pizza, love.” 

“Oh, sure!” Noah turned toward his bedroom, eyes still on the floor. 

“Everything okay? You're usually more excited about pizza than that.” there was that concern again. Dernazas always worries too much. 

“Yeah, just tired. I'm gonna go change.” he plodded across the rest of the living room to his bed room, mind running on high speed. He pulled his phone from his back pocket. He wasn't expecting to hear from Zak, but at this point it had just become a habit to check. No messages, as he thought. He kept the device in his hand though, passing through his bedroom door. A wave of relief washed over him as his hooves hit the carpet, a heavy sigh pushing all the anxiety out of his system. His room was always his safe haven, and he was even more relieved to be in this room than when he first got home. He tossed his phone on his bed, pulling his shirt up over his head and discarding it on the floor. A shiver ran across his skin as the temperature controlled air hit his chest. He caught his reflection in the mirror as he went to undo his jeans, turning to stare at it. The most he'd seen of his whole body since he had left was whatever he could look at himself or see in a standard portrait mirror. He wiggled his pants down to his ankles, stepping out of them before using one foot to fling the garment in the general direction of his shirt. Clad in only a pair of slim black panties, Noah turned back toward the mirror. He had a healthy glow about him, one he hadn't seen in years. His skin used to have this sickly paleness to it, the copper undertones almost completely gone from his addiction. He hid it fairly well underneath a heavy layer of make-up, but he always knew it looked fake. Running his fingers over his chest and stomach, he couldn't believe it was back. He pinched lightly at his side, making sure he was really seeing his own reflection. But here it was, his tawny brown features just under his fingertips, the light reflecting the copper sheen over him. Noah started to tear up. He looked deep into his reflection, scanning over his face, full and youthful. No longer would he have to hide the sunken in cheekbones or the bags under his eyes, he could face his father again without looking like a zombie. Wiping away the tears, he moved to his wardrobe, pulling out a pair of black lounging shorts and a loose pink sweater. Noah contemplated a shower too, but he knew his father would want to catch up and he could always take a proper bath after Dernazas went to bed. Pulling the shorts up over his hips and the sweater over his head, he headed back to the living room. 

“Oh, I figured you would've taken longer pumpkin.” Dernazas was seated at the island counter in the attached kitchen, thumbing through papers, “I wouldn't have pulled out work to do otherwise.” 

“I just wanted to change. I'll shower later.” Noah reclaimed his lounging spot on the couch, “Anything horrible happen when I was gone?” 

“No, no. Thankfully.” the don carried his papers with him back to the living room, “The council was asking when to expect you back.” 

The small devil let out a long exasperated groan, “I don't know Papa. I quite literally just got home. Can we talk about that tomorrow?” 

Dernazas chuckled, “I suppose it can wait. How are you...” his voice trailed off as he scanned Noah's features, “Did you wash your face at all?” 

“No?” Noah scrunched his brow in confusion, “Why?” 

“You didn't put any make up on or anything? You look so refreshed.” 

“Papa, stop it.” A soft blush dusted Noah's cheeks, “I feel refreshed. I couldn't believe it either when I saw my reflection.” 

There were tears in Dernazas' eyes as he leaned across the gap between them and cupped Noah's cheek, “My baby...I've missed you so much.” he pulled Noah in for a tight embrace. 

“Papa...I'm almost 250, I'm not a baby anymore.” 

“You'll always be my baby Noah, no matter how old you get.” he ran his thumb over the small devil's cheek. “I'm so glad you're home and feeling well.” 

“I am too.” he gently pushed his father's shoulders, trying to encourage the stout demon to release his grip, “Though I'm still getting cravings every now and again.” 

“I'm sure they'll pass.” Dernazas sat back in his seat, “But I'm more interested in you and Zakamin talking. He's worked for me for twenty years and I've never heard him talk anything but business. He must have really taken a shine to you.” 

“You said that before I left.” Noah sat up, pulling his knees to his chest, “But he's sweet. It's been nice having someone familiar to talk to that's not family.” 

“Should I be worried about one of my employees stealing you away?” the Don cocked an eyebrow. 

“I mean technically it was your idea to talk to him in the first place.” Noah smirked, “But no, I don’t think you need to worry. We’re just friends.” 

The front door clicked and a few moments later one of the housekeepers arrived up the stairs, two pizza boxes in hand. She set them down on the coffee table silently before retreating back to her work. Noah offered her a smile in gratitude but it seemed to go unnoticed. He shrugged it off, flipping one of the boxes open and grabbing a piece for himself before settling back on the couch. 

“Fair enough. What kinds of things have you two talked about?” 

“Just, stuff.” His words were muffled from the food in his mouth. “Family, hobbies, ya know, typical getting to know you type stuff.” 

“I see.” the Don settled back into the paperwork in his lap, “I assume he told you he came to me about seeing a therapist?” 

Noah nodded, shoving more of his dinner into his mouth, “I made the suggestion.” 

“Well, it seems to have changed his demeanor.” Dernazas flicked his gaze back to Noah, a light smile crossing his lips, “Tazgon told me his work ethic has improved as well. So I guess I should be thanking you.” 

“Then you're welcome.” the small devil snickered. A loud slam vibrated through the house, muffled shouting following shortly after. 

“Speaking of which.” Dernazas sighed, keeping his eyes on his work, “Seems they're finally back.” 

“Are they...always that loud?” Noah laughed again, “I don't remember hearing them so clearly before.” 

“Just two of them are. The others seem to have some manners.” he shook his head, “Like having teenagers in this house again.” 

“I wasn't that bad, was I?” 

“No pumpkin,” Dernazas chuckled, “Surprisingly, you were worse.” 

“Papa!” Noah feigned offense. 

“I'm joking, I'm joking.” another meek staff member arrived up the stairs, whispering something into the Don's ear. He gave a hushed response before shifting, “Well, I sadly must take care of an, incident.” he stood up, gently running his hand over Noah's head, “I'll see you in the morning?” 

“Okay.” 

“Don't stay up too late.” he kissed Noah's cheek before making his way to the stairs on the other end of the loft. The small demon sighed, snuggling into his seat. He looked around his position quickly before remembering he had left his phone on the bed. 

An exasperated groan fell from his mouth, peeling himself off the couch before trudging back to his room. His phone was still nestled on the blanket, face down just as he had tossed it. He flipped it over in his hand, clicking it open as he returned to the living room, curling back up in his seat. Zak had texted him a couple of times while he was with his father. 

_How does it feel bein home?_

_You're probably with the Boss, but it felt weird to not text you. Let me know when you've been released._

Noah sighed, a warm smile growing as he replied, _Papa just left to take care of something. I heard you guys getting back._

He set his phone down on the arm of the couch, grabbing another slice of pizza for himself. It buzzed, 

_That was Buzz and Will actually. I've been back for an hour or so._

_Oh. Then I'm assuming the job went well?_

No response. Noah sighed. Zak probably got wrapped up in something work related. He started scrolling through his social media as he ate, checking in on what was happening downtown that night. His skin started to crawl, the tingling sensation rippling through his nerves. He fought back the urge to scratch at himself, instead closing the app quickly and instead pulling up his book. Probably still too soon to be exposed to his old life again. A notification slid down in front of his reading. He clicked it open. 

_Yeah it went fine, once I smacked some sense into Talon._

Noah started typing out a reply when another message appeared. 

_If you're alone I'd love to see you. I don't think I can wait until tomorrow._

The small demon smiled, shifting in his seat, _Sure. Papa got pizza for us and there's still a ton left if you're hungry._

_Ok, I'll be up in a bit._

He set his phone down again, excitement overtaking the crawling sensation. His smile faded, realizing he wasn't really dressed for company. He put his feet back on the floor, sitting up straighter. If he was fast he may be able to throw something else on. Then again, Zak has seen him at his absolute worst, would it really be worth it to fancy himself up for a quick visit from a friend? Noah shook his head, letting out a calming breath. He curled back into his seat, running a hand through his hair, letting the other drum its fingers on his exposed knee. A blush crossed his features again, the distant click of a closing door signaling Zak making his way up. His heart started beating faster. What would even be the proper greeting for this? Noah wanted to run up and hug the large devil as soon as he hit the top step, but he knew it probably wasn't smart. Not to mention the possibility of the two of them tumbling backwards down the whole flight, Noah worried he would set off a panic attack if he surprised Zak like that. Maybe just a friendly nod and “hello?” That seemed more reasonable. Much less Noah's style, but reasonable. Heavy footsteps on the wood echoes through the cavernous house, growing louder as they grew closer. Noah kept his eyes focused on the grain of the floor directly in front of him, the blush deepening as he heard Zak approach. 

“Did you miss the floor that badly pipsqueak?” that familiar smoky voice sent a shiver down Noah's spine as he turned to look. He stayed seated, waving slightly with a smile. Zak chuckled, “You glued to the seat or am I gonna get a hug?” That sounded enough like an invitation to get Noah moving. He approached sheepishly, wrapping his arms around Zak's waist. Another deep laugh rumbled in his chest, “You okay?” 

“Y-yeah...” Noah felt his throat close up, nerves blocking out the things he planned to say, “Just tired. Long day.” 

He unwound his arms from his friend, returning to the couch. Zak took a seat beside him, the two sharing a companionable silence. The larger tilted his head to the slightly ajar pizza box, “It's not something nasty like pineapple is it?” 

Noah giggled, “Hey, don't knock it 'til you've tried it.” He brought his feet back up on the couch, “But no, the open one isn't.” 

“So there is a gross one.” Zak shook his head, grabbing a slice from the untainted box, “I thought we could be friends but if that's how you eat your pizza I may have to reconsider.” 

Noah laughed again, covering his mouth with one of his hands. He stared at his friend, heart fluttering seeing the devil of his affections in the flesh after so long. The way he so quickly started ribbing Noah, like he never even left had him reeling. Maybe bringing up his feelings wasn't a bad idea. 

“Cat got your tongue princess?” Zak quipped between bites, “If you'd rather text I'll just take this box back to my dorm.” 

“No, just...trying to think of something to say.” Noah averted his eyes, resting his chin in his palm, “I have so much I want to tell you, to catch you up on after we last checked in on my recovery.” 

“Nah, save it. I'd rather just talk about whatever.” Zak rested on his knees, “Like we usually do, brush off the heavy stuff.” 

“I mean, I haven't asked how your sessions have been going?” 

“That sounds like heavy stuff Noah.” Zak scoffed, “But I feel ya. It's been fine. Haven't had a panic attack in almost two weeks.” 

“That's good.” Noah glanced over at Zak. He seemed nervous, twiddling his thumbs and chewing the inside of his cheek. Probably trying to be subtle about it, “I mean you didn't freak out when I hugged you so that has to be good, right?” 

Zak merely shook his head, letting out a half-laugh as he looked away. Noah shifted again. Why was this so awkward? Was he making it awkward? Was Zak? He sighed, lifting his head from his hand and rubbing his other bicep. “Actually...” Zak's voice wavered, “I, I wanted to ask you something.” 

“What's up?” oh boy, here it comes. Noah turned his seat so he was fully facing Zak, cross-legged. 

“We've been talking for a while, and I feel like we've gotten to know each other better. And I consider you a friend, and I assume you do too.” Noah's heart was in his ears, carefully dissecting Zak's words, “And I'm sure most of it was teasing but...” his sentence trailed off. Noah held his breath. Was he getting...a confession? “But I...really like you. Like, more than I thought I would.” Zak laughed nervously, running a hand over his scalp. He stood suddenly, face beet red, “N-nevermind. I'm tired, I'm gonna-” 

“Zak.” Noah grabbed Zak's arm, slowly tugging him back onto the couch, “Don't be afraid. Just say what you were gonna-” 

_**“Do you wanna go out with me?”**_ Noah didn't think it was possible to see someone with such a deep umber complexion to turn so red. The blush on Zak's face even reached the tips of his ears, his eyes screwed shut, fists clenched, like he was preparing for the rejection before the question even came out. 

Noah giggled, running his thumb over the thoroughly embarrassed devil's arm, “Zak, you're very sweet.” he scooted closer, moving his hand to Zak's fiery cheek, “I would love to. I was actually...” his own blush returned, “I was actually kinda hoping you would ask.” 

“R-really?” the large demon perked up, eyes finally cracking open. For such an intense color combination, Noah never noticed how soft Zak's eyes really were. The slit pupils actually offered an air of compassion that he never noticed before. Noah nodded, keeping his eyes fixated on Zak's. A smile broke through the blush, nervous laughter filling the room, “O-Okay. Um...so, do you wanna...get dinner tomorrow night? I don't know when you're expected to be back to work but I figured we could--” Noah placed his index finger over Zak's mouth, giggling, “Tomorrow night sounds great sugar. We can talk about plans in the morning?” Zak nodded, smile plastered on his face. He stood back up, stiffly moving back towards the stairs. The spade tip of his tail was flicking back and forth quickly as he moved, almost as if it was wagging. Noah stifled a louder laugh. Poor thing looked so disheveled it was just too adorable. “Good night Zak.” 

He paused at the banister, straightening up at Noah's call. He turned back slightly, “G-good night.” he squeaked out before rushing down the stairs. Noah curled back up on the couch, hugging his knees tight against his chest. He lightly pinched his shoulder to make sure he wasn't dreaming, an excited giggle escaping his lips. Tomorrow couldn't come quick enough.


End file.
